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The Law Is A Ass #428: Trial And Era With The Flash

It’s just like riding a bike. Once you’ve done it, doing it again is easy.

And what we’ve done, and are doing again, is “The Trial of The Flash.” Sorry, that should be the trial of Barry Allen as it wasn’t The Flash who was on trial for murder in the January 16th episode of The Flash, it was his secret identity Barry Allen. I’d think the old habits formed in columns of another era were dying hard but even the TV show called this episode “The Trial of The Flash.”

Anyway, The Flash – err, Barry Allen – was on trial for killing Reverse-Flash – I mean Clifford DeVoe; damn that muscle memory. Barry didn’t kill DeVoe. DeVoe, the super genius dubbed The Thinker, had transferred his mind into the body of a man named Dominic Lanse, because DeVoe’s own body was paralyzed and atrophying. DeVoe took his lifeless shell of a former body to Barry Allen’s apartment, stabbed it with one of Barry’s knives, and arranged for the police to find Barry standing over the body. Presto, Barry was framed better than Dogs Playing Poker.

Barry’s defense attorney Cecille Horton decided that the best way to beat the murder rap was to reveal to the world that Barry was The Flash…

Damn it! You’d think that after thirty years my fingers wouldn’t automatically write about the events of that old “The Trial of The Flash.”

Oh wait. Cecille wanted to do that in the current “The Trial of The Flash,” too. She decided the only way for Barry to beat the case would be for him to testify, which would require revealing his secret identity. No logical arguments such as, Barry is an expert forensic scientist for the police, so would he plan a crime so clumsy that all the evidence pointed to him. Or, if Barry had actually knifed DeVoe to death, why wasn’t there any blood on him when the police found him? Nope, nothing like that could be tried. Or tried. Only revealing Barry’s secret identity so he could testify could save him.

Problem was, Barry didn’t want to reveal his secret identity. He said if his Rogue’s Gallery learned his secret identity then all his family and friends would be in danger of reprisal from said Rogues.

Uh, Barry, you and your father-in-law, Joe West, are police officers who have openly worked with Team Flash in the past. I think you and Joe are already targets. Cecille, who’s engaged to Joe, used to be a prosecutor. So we can kind of reprise the reprisal for her. And your wife, Iris West-Allen, is a crime reporter who probably already has an enemies list as formidable as Richard Nixon’s. As for your other friends – the super heroes Vibe, Killer Frost, and Elongated Man, the Rogues already hate them, too. But they can kind of take care of themselves.

The point I’m making is that your family and friends already have targets on them. So not revealing your secret identity isn’t really protecting them all that much.

Moreover, at this point who in Central City doesn’t know the Flash’s secret identity? He and his team routinely use their street names while in costume. Their attitude toward preserving Flash’s identity is about as cavalier as a Cleveland sporting goods store in January. And even if there are some members of the general public who don’t know Flash’s identity; which of his Rogue’s Gallery doesn’t know it? Girder knows it. Pied Piper knows it. As does Plastique, Captain Cold, Reverse-Flash, Zoom, Weather Wizard, Savitar, Heat Wave, Abra Kadabra, Clifford DeVoe, and Gorilla Grodd. Did I leave any out? Probably.

So, again, Barry not revealing his secret identity? Not so helpful in the whole protecting-your-family-and-friends department.

The prosecution called Marlize DeVoe, the “widow” of Clifford DeVoe, as a witness. When Cecille cross-examined her, she used some photos that Joe Allen and Ralph (The Elongated Man) Dibny took of her in lip lock with Dominic Lanse. (Remember, her husband’s mind was in Dominic’s body, so she was actually kissing her husband.) Cecille suggested that maybe she and her husband weren’t so much in love and she and her new lover were tired of waiting for her husband to die so killed him.

Which is one of the worst ways to introduce that evidence. Why? Because it gave Marlize an immediate chance to explain the pictures. She said her husband was dying of ALS and she met Dominic, whose father died of the same disease, in an ALS support group. Her husband could see their mutual attraction so he encouraged Marlize to go to Dominic for the things he could no longer give her. It won the jury back to Marlize’s side.

The better way to introduce the evidence is spring it in the defense case-in-chief. Sure Marlize could try to explain it away. But she wouldn’t be able to do that until the state’s rebuttal case which would be hours – or days – later. Any bad feelings the jury might have gotten from the picture would sit in them for those hours — or days – and take root. So maybe, the jury wouldn’t buy into Marlize’s explanation quite so easily. That way, the closing argument of “We only have her word that she had her husband’s blessing. Maybe she and Dominic were tired of waiting for Clifford DeVoe to die and decided to do something about it,” would have had more effect.

And, for that matter, did anyone think to check out Marlize’s story? Did Dominic’s father really die of ALS? We know they didn’t meet in a support group, so why not check into his father’s death. If Dominic’s father did die of ALS – and what are the odds of that? – nothing’s changed. But if he didn’t, then Marlize committed perjury and the jury would have discounted most everything she said. To answer my own question, no one bothered to check Marlize’s story. So there’s some good criminal defense work.

And…

Yes, “and.” It’s happened again. I’ve run out of column before running out of material. Only this time it isn’t muscle memory causing me to re-type something I wrote back in 1983. This time it’s happening now. Seems that no matter what century I’m in, I’m fated to write endlessly about “The Trial of The Flash.”

LEGO® DC Super Hero Girls: Super-Villain High Arrives in May

BURBANK, CA (February 20, 2018) – Everyone’s favorite female Super Heroes are left to deal with a new rival when a mysterious high school pops up in the all-new animated film, LEGO® DC Super Hero Girls: Super-Villain High. Produced by Warner Bros. Animation, DC Entertainment and The LEGO Group, the film – a continuation in the worldwide DC Super Hero Girls franchise phenomenon – will be distributed by Warner Bros. Home Entertainment (WBHE) May 1, 2018 on Digital ($19.99 SRP), and on May 15, 2018 on DVD ($19.98 SRP).

After a mysterious school opens across the street, the students of Super Hero High find themselves up against a new threat. Now, Wonder Woman, Supergirl, Batgirl and the rest of the DC Super Hero Girls not only have to worry about the well-being of their grades, but the safety and security of friends, family and the rest of civilization. The girls must figure out how to put a stop to this evil, new cross-town rival and save the world once again!

The LEGO® DC Super Hero Girls voice cast returns its core cast with Grey Griffin (Wonder Woman), Tara Strong (Harley Quinn/Poison Ivy), Anais Fairweather (Supergirl), Teala Dunn (Bumblebee), Stephanie Sheh (Katana), and Ashlyn Selich (Batgirl). The cast also includes Yvette Nicole Brown (Amanda Waller), Greg Cipes (Beast Boy), Romi Dames (Lena Luthor), John DiMaggio (Gorilla Grodd, Wildcat), Josh Keaton (The Flash), Khary Payton (Cyborg) and Meredith Salenger (Lashina).

Elsa Garagarza (Star Wars: Forces of Destiny) directs LEGO® DC Super Hero Girls: Super-Villain High from a script by Jeremy Adams (Justice League Action, LEGO® Scooby-Doo!). Rick Morales (LEGO® Scooby-Doo! Haunted Hollywood) serves as producer, with Sam Register (Teen Titans Go!), Jill Wilfert (The LEGO® Movie, The LEGO® Batman Movie) and Robert Fewkes (LEGO® Frozen Northern Lights) serving as executive producers.

From Warner Bros. Consumer Products and DC Entertainment, the DC Super Hero Girls universe encourages young girls and kids to explore their own powers and strengths through original content, including all-new films, webisodes and TV specials. The franchise offers young fans inspiration and encourages teamwork, friendship and empowerment. DC Super Hero Girls: Super-Villain High will connect with fans throughout the world through the brand’s vast digital content networks, including LEGO.com, DCSuperHeroGirls.com, the DCSHG App, YouTube Channel and Instagram, as well as a global licensing and merchandising program.

“We’re thrilled to release a second LEGO® DC Super Hero Girls film that’s fun for young girls to view and enjoy,” said Mary Ellen Thomas, Warner Bros. Home Entertainment Vice President, Family & Animation Marketing. “LEGO toys rank #1 amongst Children ages 6-11, allowing these films to resonate with children.”

SPECIAL FEATURES

  • Six Animated Shorts
    • Crazed and Confused
    • Need for Speed
    • Showdown
    • Trading Places
    • Wonder Waitress
    • Bodybuilding

BASICS

Street Date: May 15, 2018
Run Time:  approximately 78 minutes
DVD Audio – English
DVD Price: $19.98 SRP
HD EST Price: $19.99 SRP
SD EST Price: $14.99 SRP

A Clip from LEGO DC Super Heroes: The Flash

In LEGO DC Super Heroes: The Flash, Reverse-Flash manipulates the Speed Force to put The Flash into a time loop that forces him to relive the same day over and over again – with progressively disastrous results, including losing his powers and being fired by the Justice League. The Flash must find a way to restore time to its original path and finally apprehend his worst enemy before all is lost for The Flash … and the world!

Along the route, The Flash encounters numerous new characters being introduced to the popular DC Super Heroes series, including The Atom; B’dg, a squirrel-esque Green Lantern; a pair of legendary super pets in Ace the Bat-Hound and Krypto the Super-Dog, Batman and Superman’s faithful canine pals; as well as Aquaman’s trusted seahorse, Storm.

Produced by Warner Bros. Animation, DC Entertainment and the LEGO Group, LEGO DC Super Heroes: The Flash is currently available from Warner Bros. Home Entertainment on Digital. WBHE will distribute the film on March 13, 2016 on Blu-rayTM Combo Pack and DVD.

Star Wars: The Last Jedi Brings the Force Home in March

BURBANK, Calif. (February 20, 2018) — Lucasfilm’s Star Wars: The Last Jedi—the next action-packed chapter of the Star Wars saga— Earned critical acclaim and the No. 1 spot atop 2017’s list of highest-grossing films. The visually stunning film welcomes the return of original characters, including Luke Skywalker, Princess Leia, Chewbacca, Yoda, R2-D2 and C-3PO and further explores the deepening journey of the saga’s new members, Rey, Finn, Poe, and Kylo Ren. Now families can bring home the movie digitally in HD and 4K Ultra HD™ and via Movies Anywhere on March 13, two weeks before the 4K Ultra HD™ Blu-ray, and Blu-ray™ disc on March 27.  This release also marks Disney’s first title available on 4K Ultra HD Blu-ray disc in both Dolby Vision™ HDR and Dolby Atmos® immersive audio, delivering consumers a transformative viewing experience.

Director Rian Johnson takes fans on an intimate journey into the creation of Star Wars: The Last Jedi in a feature-length documentary, explaining his unique interpretation of the Force, detailing the painstaking process of creating Snoke, and deconstructing action-packed scenes from the film such as the epic space battle and the final confrontation. Johnson also reveals two exclusive scenes, featuring Andy Serkis as Snoke prior to his digital makeover, as well as 14 never-before-seen deleted scenes, in addition to his audio commentary.

Bonus features include*:

  • The Director and the Jedi – Go deep behind the scenes with writer-director Rian Johnson on an intimate and personal journey through the production of the movie—and experience what it’s like to helm a global franchise and cultural phenomenon.
  • Balance of the Force – Explore the mythology of the Force and why Rian Johnson chose to interpret its role in such a unique way.
  • Scene Breakdowns
    • Lighting the Spark: Creating the Space Battle – Get a close-up look at the epic space battle, from the sounds that help propel the action, through the practical and visual effects, to the characters who bring it all to life.
    • Snoke and Mirrors – Motion capture and Star Wars collide as the filmmakers take us through the detailed process of creating the movie’s malevolent master villain.
    • Showdown on Crait – Break down everything that went into creating the stunning world seen in the movie’s final confrontation, including the interplay between real-word locations and visual effects, reimagining the walkers, designing the crystal foxes, and much more.
  • Andy Serkis Live! (One Night Only) – Writer-director Rian Johnson presents two exclusive sequences from the movie featuring Andy Serkis’ riveting, raw on-set performance before his digital makeover into Snoke.
  • Deleted Scenes – With an introduction and optional commentary by writer-director Rian Johnson.
  • Audio Commentary – View the movie with in-depth feature audio commentary by writer-director Rian Johnson.

* Digital bonus offerings may vary by retailer.

Star Wars: The Last Jedi is packaged several ways to ensure fans get the most out of their in-home viewing experience. The Multiscreen Edition (formerly the Blu-ray Combo Pack) includes Blu-ray, and a Digital copy, giving viewers the flexibility to watch the film on different devices. Those with 4K Ultra HD capability may opt for a 4K UHD Collector’s Edition, including 4K Ultra HD disc with Dolby Vision and Dolby Atmos, Blu-ray disc, and a digital copy (where available). Dolby Vision delivers greater brightness and contrast, as well as a fuller palette of rich colors. Dolby Atmos places and moves audio anywhere in the room, including overhead. Together on 4K Ultra HD Blu-ray disc, viewers will practically feel the Force in their own home.

DISC SPECIFICATIONS:

FEATURE RUN TIME: Approximately 152 min.
RATING: PG-13 in U.S.; PG in CE; PG in CF
ASPECT RATIO: 2.39:1
AUDIO:
4K UHD (US): English 7.14 Dolby Atmos; English 7.1 Dolby Audio™; English 2.0 Descriptive Audio, Spanish 7.1 Dolby Audio
4K UHD (Canada): English 7.1.4 Dolby Atmos; English 7.1 Dolby Audio; English 2.0 Descriptive Audio, French 7.1 Dolby Audio
Blu-ray: English 7.1 DTS-HDMA, English 2.0 Descriptive Audio, French and Spanish 5.1 Dolby Audio Language Tracks
DVD: English 5.1 Dolby Audio, English 2.0 Descriptive Audio, French and Spanish 5.1 Dolby Audio Language Tracks
Digital 4K UHD: English Dolby Atmos (where available), English 7.1 Dolby Audio (where available), English, French & Spanish 5.1 Dolby Audio, English 2.0 Descriptive Audio (where available)
Digital HD: English, French & Spanish 5.1 Dolby Audio, English 2.0 Descriptive Audio (where available)
SUBTITLES:
UHD / BD: English SDH, French & Spanish
DVD: English SDH, French & Spanish
Digital: English SDH, English Closed Caption, French & Spanish (where available)

ABOUT STAR WARS: THE LAST JEDI:

In Lucasfilm’s Star Wars: The Last Jedi, the Skywalker saga continues as the heroes of The Force Awakens join the galactic legends in an epic adventure that unlocks age-old mysteries of the Force and shocking revelations of the past.

The film stars Mark Hamill, Carrie Fisher, Adam Driver, Daisy Ridley, John Boyega, Oscar Isaac, Lupita Nyong’o, Andy Serkis, Domhnall Gleeson, Anthony Daniels, Gwendoline Christie, Kelly Marie Tran, Laura Dern with Frank Oz, and Benicio Del Toro.    Star Wars: The Last Jedi is written and directed by Rian Johnson and produced by Kathleen Kennedy and Ram Bergman. J.J. Abrams, Tom Karnowski and Jason McGatlin are the executive producers.

Batman Ninja Reimagines the Dark Knight Anime Style

BURBANK, CA (February 13, 2018) – Prepare to witness the Dark Knight, alongside many of his most famed allies and infamous foes, in an eye-popping anime display you’ve never seen before when Warner Bros. Japan, DC Entertainment and Warner Bros. Home Entertainment present Batman Ninja. The all-new, feature-length animated film arrives on Digital starting April 24, 2018, and Blu-ray™ Steelbook ($29.98 SRP), Blu-ray™ Combo Pack ($24.98 SRP) and DVD ($19.98 SRP) on May 8, 2018. Order due date is April 3, 2018.

The film will be available in 4K UHD for Digital only in a release planned for Summer 2018.

Batman Ninja is rated PG-13 for sequences of violence and action, and for some suggestive material.

Batman Ninja takes a journey across the ages as Gorilla Grodd’s time displacement machine transports many of Batman’s worst enemies to feudal Japan – along with the Dark Knight and a few of his allies. The villains take over the forms of the feudal lords that rule the divided land, with the Joker taking the lead among the warring factions. As his traditional high-tech weaponry is exhausted almost immediately, Batman must rely on his intellect and his allies – including Catwoman and the extended Bat-family – to restore order to the land, and return to present-day Gotham City.

The visually stunning Batman Ninja is the creative result of a trio of anime’s finest filmmakers: director Jumpei Mizusaki (Opening animation of JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure), writer Kazuki Nakashima (Gurren Lagann), and character designer Takashi Okazaki (Afro Samurai) produced the original movie with Warner Bros. Japan. The script was then reinterpreted and rewritten for English-language distribution by award-winning screenwriters Leo Chu and Eric Garcia (Supah Ninjas, Afro Samurai). Benjamin Melniker and Michael Uslan are Executive Producers.

Roger Craig Smith (Batman: Arkham Origins) and Tony Hale (Veep, Arrested Development) lead an impressive cast as the voices of Batman and the Joker, respectively. Grey Griffin (Scooby-Doo franchise) and Tara Strong (Batman: The Killing Joke) supply the voices of the antagonist & protagonist’s closest allies – Catwoman and Harley Quinn, respectively – while Fred Tatasciore (Family Guy) provides the gruff-yet-sophisticated tones of Gorilla Grodd, a villain who must team with Batman to achieve his own personal agenda. Other voice actors include Bat-family members Yuri Lowenthal (Ben 10: Omniverse) as Robin, Adam Croasdell (Reign) as Nightwing and Alfred, and Will Friedle (Boy Meets World) as Red Robin, and the Rogue’s gallery also features Tom Kenny (SpongeBob SquarePants) as Penguin and Eric Bauza (The Adventures of Puss in Boots) as Two-Face. Doing double duty is Tatasciore as Deathstroke, Strong as Poison Ivy, and Friedle as Red Hood.

Batman Ninja is an absolute feast for the senses, a stunning spectacle of anime wrapped around a thrill ride of a Batman story,” said Mary Ellen Thomas, Warner Bros. Home Entertainment Vice President, Family & Animation Marketing. “Our partners at Warner Bros. Japan have conjured an impressive addition to the Dark Knight’s canon of entertainment, taking Batman and his friends and foes in an altogether new direction. We can’t wait for fans to see this film.”

Batman Ninja Enhanced Content

Blu-ray Steelbook, Blu-ray Combo Pack and Digital

“East / West Batman” (Featurette) – Batman meets the anime medium, as this documentary looks into some of the Western tropes and archetypes, meshed into the world of feudal Japan.  East meets West, swords, samurai and giant robots, all playing into the clash between Batman and his Rogues gallery.

“Batman: Made in Japan” (Featurette) – To make a special film about Batman requires just the right artist to bring the mix of style and energy that is unmistakably anime.  The filmmakers discuss the Japanese character models, influences and design that create a fusion experience into this hyper real world.

“New York Comic Con Presents Batman Ninja” – Meet the talented filmmakers behind Batman Ninja as they discuss their inspirations and challenges in bringing an anime version of Batman to life during a panel discussion unveiling Batman Ninja during New York Comic Con 2017.

BASICS

Street Date: May 8, 2018
Order Due Date: April 3, 2018
Run Time:  85 minutes
DVD Price: $19.98 SRP
Blu-ray Combo Price: $24.98 SRP
Steelbook Blu-ray Combo Price: $29.98 SRP
Languages: English Audio and Japanese Audio

Book-A-Day 2018 #54: Lucky Penny by Ananth Hirsh and Yuko Ota

To be a sad sack, a character has to be sad. If she’s just as put-upon by life, but has a chipper attitude the whole time, she turns into something else. I’m not sure if we have a name for that something else, but maybe we can start calling her a Lucky Penny.

Penny Brighton would be a Manic Pixie Dream Girl if she were a supporting character in someone else’s story, but Lucky Penny is her story, so she’s just manic. She’s also a mess, but it’s not entirely clear how much of that is her fault. In a fictional universe, luck can be a real thing that molds lives, and maybe Penny is just cursed to fail every single luck roll.

Her book is Lucky Penny; it’s a comedy in graphic novel form — not quite a romantic comedy, closer to a comedy of errors. It’s by writer Ananth Hirsh and cartoonist Yuko Ota, who work together regularly and also appear to be a couple.

It opens with Penny, who is somewhere in her twenties but not precisely an adult, losing her clothing-retail job and her apartment in the same day. (The apartment should have been a longer-term issue, since her roommate Helen is moving away to get married, but I get the sense that Penny doesn’t make “plans” the way other people do.) So, since her judgment and adult skills are so good, she moves into Helen’s vacated storage unit (cheap!) and cajoles Helen into getting her a job at the family-owned laundromat, where she will be bossed by Helen’s kid brother David. (I can just barely believe in a laundromat that has one person working there full-time, to watch it, but two at once? That doesn’t seem right. What do you do working in a laundromat?)

Penny is energetic and lackadaisical and would be happy-go-lucky if she consistently was lucky or had more things to be happy about. But either her own lack of adult skills or the weight of the universe continually throws obstacles in her way — luckily for her and us, this is a comedy, so they’re funny obstacles. She does fail to plan for a lot of things — how will she stay warm in that unheated storage unit? how will she handle showers and other bodily needs living there? what kind of security does a roll-up door provide when you’re inside it? is she saving up to get an actual apartment? does she go shopping for food ever, or just live on her own manic pixie energy? — but, again, this is a comedy, so I should just relax.

And it is funny. Penny is a Weeble — she gets bounced around, but nothing in this particular fictional universe can actually knock her down. This is not the story of how she learns adult skills and finds a sensible apartment that she can afford, and starts taking night classes in double-entry accounting to get her foot on the ladder of success. It is the story of how she meets a cute guy at the community center, tries to scam him to get free shows, and ends up dating him in the end. Oh, and saves him from her evil boss’s plot of destruction, because Lucky Penny makes a hard left turn into another, but equally silly, genre at the end.

This is not a book to take seriously. Penny is a world-class goofball, and her world has strong goofball tendencies to begin with. And that ending genre-switch comes totally out of nowhere. But it is funny and amusing: Hirsh’s dialogue and captions are smart, and Ota is a fine cartoonist of moods and manic energy.

Reposted from The Antick Musings of G.B.H. Hornswoggler, Gent.

Book-A-Day 2018 #52: Bizarro Heroes by Dan Piraro

There’s not a whole lot to say about this book as a book, so it might be time for some Book-A-Day behind-the-scenes. You see, to keep the hopper fed — especially early in the year, which sets the tone and energy for the whole project — I’m making sure to read at least one book a day, and that generally means a book of comics. (Call it a graphic novel or a bande dessinee or a tankobon or a trade paperback or whatever you want: a book-format work of comics.)

Actually, so far, every single day it is a book of comics. Some other things, too, on top of that, but the one book every single day is comics. (I’ve got a book going in the smallest room of the house, one going by the bed, and one going here next to my computer, and I’m also reading a “real” book of prose every week, but the comics are the day-in, day-out engine that keeps this running.)

Sometimes I plan to read a particular book: I’m working through my longer graphic novels right now, for instance. But I might find, as I did one day recently, that it’s deep into the evening and I haven’t touched that book. So it’s late and I’m tired, but I want to keep the engine going. For times like that, I have a few things I know I can read quickly.

One of them was Bizarro Heroes , a 2011 collection of Bizarro comics by Dan Piraro with a superhero theme in one way or another. Bizarro is a single-panel daily cartoon anyway, with no continuity, so it’s all one-off jokes to begin with. So it would be the perfect strip to birth a series of one-off thematic books like this — get some intern earning “college credit” to tag all ten-thousand-plus strips in a database, input some search criteria, and prepare to pump out product.

Sadly, the era for one-off thematic books (Bizarro Golf! Bizarro Tennis! Bizarro Smug Vegetarianism! Bizarro Inexplicable Melancholy!) ended not too long after Piraro launched Bizarro in 1985, and his obsessions were never all that in tune with mass America to begin with. So I don’t think the glorious era of themed Bizarro books ever got off the ground. But this one does exist, and superheroes are even hotter now than they were in 2011.

Bizarro Heroes is about what you’d expect: a hundred pages of comics, generally one to a page, all with jokes about superheroes. Piraro knows the obvious stuff, but clearly isn’t a superhero geek: he makes a Batman/Manbat joke that shows he didn’t know there was an actual Man-Bat in the Batman comics. So these are sometimes jokes about other things using superheroes, sometimes jokes about how superheroes are silly, and sometimes jokes about the usual furniture of capes and secret identities. About half of the cartoons are in color; the rest are black and white. They seem to be entirely from the decade before the book — I found some dated as early as 2000, but they mostly come from 2007-2010.

If you’re in the market for a book of single-panel cartoons about superheroes, you probably don’t have many choices. Even with the lack of competition, though, this is a pretty good choice — as long as you aren’t so much more geeky than Piraro that his lack of geekitude will annoy you (and there definitely are plenty of guys like that; you’ll know if you are one).

Reposted from The Antick Musings of G.B.H. Hornswoggler, Gent.

The Law Is A Ass #427: The Flash Sings Happy Trials To You

So what do you do when you’re feeling nostalgic? If you’re me – and luckily for me, I am me – you write about The Trial of the Flash. No, not the one from 1983, the one from last month. On the TV series The Flash.

So let’s get you up to speed; pun intended. This season Team Flash is fighting Clifford DeVoe, AKA The Thinker, a genius who’s one coyote away from being a super genius and orchestrating some sort of season-long master plan to hector The Flash.

And here’s where we start getting into SPOILER ALERT! territory. I’m about to reveal important plot details from several episodes of The Flash. Why? It’s in my job description. Right after wise ass. If you’re one of those people who don’t watch a show until the DVD set comes out or you binge it on a streaming service, so aren’t current with the current season of The Flash, you might want to stop reading now. The column will be in the archives so you can read it after you’re all caught up. And that way you come here twice so I get more hits.

After The Flash finally figured out DeVoe was the big bad this season, he changed into his secret identity, Barry Allen Central City Police forensic scientist, to question DeVoe. Which played right into DeVoe’s hands. DeVoe had orchestrated events to cause Barry to confront him. DeVoe further manipulated Barry into continuing to confront DeVoe and DeVoe’s wife, until the DeVoes were able to get Barry’s boss Captain Singh to issue a restraining order against Barry. Next DeVoe transferred his consciousness into a man named Dominic Lanse, because DeVoe’s super brain was sapping all the energy from his body, making it atrophy and become paralyzed. DeVoe didn’t want his old body anymore, but he still had a use for it. After the mind transfer, DeVoe/Lanse took his former body to Barry’s apartment, stabbed it with a knife that was there in the apartment, and arranged for the police to find Barry standing over the lifeless, bleeding body of Clifford DeVoe. Presto, the framed Barry was on trial for murdering DeVoe. Now I know I said DeVoe orchestrated these events, but for DeVoe’s manipulations to work, Barry had to act like a complete idiot. So maybe I should have said DeVoe string quarteted them.

According to the show, Barry was arrested on Christmas Eve, 2017. His trial started when The Flash came out of its winter break on January 16, 2017. Which, uh, no! The Constitution guarantees everyone a speedy trial, but that doesn’t mean that the trial starts a few weeks after arrest, giving no one enough time to prepare. Even in the Arrowverse, trials aren’t as speedy as Speedy Gonzales. (You were expecting me to say as speedy as the Flash. Psych!)

The first thing we learned about the trial was that Cecille Horton, a prosecutor and also the fiancée of Barry’s father-in-law, took a leave of absence from the prosecutor’s office to defend Barry. Which seems doubtful. Although the Constitution – yes that again – does guarantee Barry the right to an attorney of his choice, he can’t choose an attorney who would have a conflict of interests in the case. An attorney who was employed by the prosecutor’s office while it was building its case against Barry then left the prosecutor’s office to defend Barry would probably be on the grounds that the attorney could well have learned privileged things about the prosecution’s case while was still in the prosecutor’s office.

On the other hand, considering how poorly Cecille represented Barry, the prosecutor’s office wouldn’t want to disqualify her. It probably welcomed her with arms more open than a Walmart on Black Friday.

The trial started with a montage of scenes in which Anton Slater, the prosecutor, lectured the jury. I’m assuming he was delivering his opening statement. Either that or he was testifying himself, because there wasn’t anyone in the witness stand. As I don’t think even the most careless of Hollywood writers would actually have a prosecutor testifying, we’ll go with opening statement.

Slater’s opening statement was a bit more complete than most. Opening statements give the jury a general overview of what each side expects its case will prove, not every detail of their case. If you give away your whole case in the opening statements, then the jury won’t pay attention when the witnesses testify. And if they’re not paying attention to the witnesses, how will the jury hear it when some witness confesses that he killed the victim? (Oops. Wrong show.)

Slater’s more-detailed-than-most opening statement included showing actual evidence to the jury, such as the restraining order that the DeVoes obtained against Barry and the knife that was still covered in blood. Showing evidence to the jury during opening statements is problematic. Technically, evidence isn’t supposed to be shown to the jury until after it has been authenticated by a witness or witnesses and the judge rules that it is admissible. If you show evidence during opening statements and the judge later rules that the evidence was inadmissible, you’re just inviting a mistrial. And while judges may like invitations to political fundraisers, they hate invitations to mistrials. They hate actual mistrials even more. For that reason, many judges will not permit lawyers to show the jury actual evidence during opening statements

About that restraining order that the DeVoes obtained against Barry. Captain Singh, Barry’s boss in the Central City Police Department, testified that he issued it on behalf of the DeVoes. Which he didn’t. Restraining orders are judicial orders that judges issue after hearing evidence detailing why the person seeking the order needs some other party restrained from doing something. The judicial branch issues restraining orders and the executive branch, through the police, enforce them. Singh could have given Barry a formal reprimand. He could have ordered Barry to stay away from the DeVoes as a matter of departmental policy. But unless Central City is in the habit of bouncing checks and balances, Singh wouldn’t have issued a restraining order against Barry.

So far we’ve had all of that, and I’m just getting started. Literally. I’ve just started covering this episode of The Flash. I won’t finish until next column. At least I think next column. Based on my notes, it might take longer to write about the trial of The Flash than the actual trial.

#WakandaTheVote gets voters registered at ‘Black Panther’ showings

Ebony magazine reports that Black Panther is going to have an even bigger impact in America than expected, as people are signing up voters at screenings.

#WakandaTheVote is a measure from the Electoral Justice Project (EJP) which will allow moviegoers to register to vote at Black Panther screenings throughout the nation. The mission was the brainchild of EJP founders Kayla Reed, Jessica Byrd and Rukia Lumumba.“This weekend we wanted to meet our people in Wakanda,” Byrd and Reed told Blavity. “We know that for some it’s a superhero world, but we know that the world we deserve is still waiting to be built — and we want to build it! This upcoming spring and November 2018 midterm elections are an important step in building that new world, and we want to take every opportunity to engage our communities in the conversation of electoral justice. We will be registering people to vote at movie theaters across the country so that we can #wakandathevote at the ballot box.”

We confess we look forward to seeing certain people freak out over this.

Source: #WakandaTheVote Allows for Voter Registration at ‘Black Panther’ Screenings

Book-A-Day 2018 #48: Shoulder-A-Coffin Kuro, Vols. 4 & 5 by Satoko Kiyuduki

Reading a book at four-year intervals is probably not the best way to keep it in the front of one’s mind. But I read the first two volumes of Shoulder-A-Coffin Kuro (one and two) back in 2010, and then the third in 2014, so, since it’s 2018 now, I couldn’t continue any earlier than now, can I?

(It would be nice to have a time machine, but, in real life, “today” is always the earliest anything can be done.)

So here I am in 2018, having just read Volumes Four and Five of Shoulder-A-Coffin Kuro, a comic I remember enjoying quite a bit back then. But, this time, I’m not as enthusiastic about Satoko Kiyuduki’s world and storyline — much of the dialogue feels like a lot of pseudo-philosophical windiness that doesn’t actually say anything (that could be translation issues, though, or lack of cultural context on my part) and the vertical 4-koma format (except for some pages that read right-to-left like regular manga, to trip me up) forces every interaction and conversation into the same four-box structure with a punch-line-like zinger at the end.

Kuro is a young woman, but precisely how young is difficult to say. She’s drawn to look pre-teen, but that could just be a style. She was cursed by a witch, for reasons and in a way that still isn’t entirely clear at this point, and has to wander the world, lugging her coffin, until she either becomes a witch herself or dies. (As finally becomes semi-explicit in these volumes.) This is not nearly as dramatic as you’re hoping it will be. Instead, she does a lot of vague talking about what it means to be a traveler, except when other characters are saying similar, and if possible even vaguer, things.

We also get an origin for that witch — I think; it’s someone’s origin and it’s not Kuro’s — somewhere in the middle here. It’s sad but vaguely pointless, unless meant to underline that life is arbitrary and capricious and that everything kinda sucks. The witch is also traveling, though she doesn’t have strong opinions on the subject the way other characters do. And they’re traveling through vaguely fantasy-ish lands, nowhere in particular and far away from cities and large groups of people and anything particularly exciting.

Kuro does occasionally wander through pieces of other stories along her travels, but she’s always at the center: everyone is happy to stop whatever they’re doing to engage in long conversations with the little girl lugging her own coffin. Late in the second volume, someone actually tries to kill Kuro, which at least adds a bit of variety. It doesn’t take, of course.

Kuro is not as mopey as she could be: she’s more dogged, in that essential manga way, devoted to keeping on moving forward and being as positive as she can be until something new happens. That’s encouraging, but I still wanted things to happen here, and not just have a moment of “oh, gosh, we all perceive this area differently! isn’t that odd” before Kuro and her companions move on.

So: the 4-koma format is inherently episodic and distancing, and is tending to make Shoulder-a-Coffin Kuro spin its wheels through the same few philosophical thoughts at this point in its life. And sometimes mysteries are much more enticing than their solutions: I think this is a fine example of that effect. The fact that this book is published at really long intervals — a sixth volume, I see, just came out last fall — doesn’t help much, either.

Reposted from The Antick Musings of G.B.H. Hornswoggler, Gent.