Not a dream! Not a hoax! Not 1959! Archie and… Valerie?

ByGlenn Hauman

Sweet Christmas. Daaaamn.

A few thoughts:

  • Archie, you already can’t choose between Betty and Veronica.
  • The first person to say anything about Archie chasing strange pussy gets punched in the neck.
  • I don’t envy Archie Comics the amount of bigoted hate mail they’re going to get from a certain segment of the populace. And I applaud them for doing it. There are some people that deserve to be pissed off.
  • On the other hand, maybe they’re hoping to increase sales because they’ll be bought for bonfires.
  • This could be a very interesting story. Not to be confused with Stories, the 70’s one hit wonder best know for the song “Brother Louie”, which applies very well here. In fact, all you have to do is change Louie to Archie and see how little things have changed in 35 years:

She was black as the night

Archie was whiter than white

Danger, danger when you taste brown sugar

Archie fell in love overnight



Nothing bad, it was good

Archie had the best girl he could

When he took her home

To meet his mama and papa

Archie knew just where he stood



Archie Archie Archie, Archie
Archie Archie Archie, Arch-I
Archie Archie Archie, Archie
Archie Archie you’re gonna cry



There he stood in the night

Knowing what’s wrong from what’s right

He took her home to meet his mama and papa

Man, he had a terrible fright



Archie nearly caused a scene

Wishin’ it was a dream

Ain’t no diff’rence if you’re black or white

Brothers, you know what I mean


Archie Archie Archie, Archie
Archie Archie Archie, Arch-I
Archie Archie Archie, Archie

Archie Archie you’re gonna cry

PR after the jump.

Two of the greatest bands in comic book history hook up like never before when Josie and the Pussycats come to town to tour with The Archies. However, more than music is made on one starry night outside Archie’s home, when there’s a kiss that could change Riverdale forever. Is it possible that the pure-hearted, red-haired lead of The Archies is really falling in love with Valerie, the beautiful bassist/songwriter of Josie and the Pussycats? What will happen to Betty and Veronica? “It Starts with a Kiss” is the beginning of a tale to be continued. Don’t miss out while the world watches to see if Archie and Valerie have what it takes to make their love survive. Look for part one in Archie #608, hitting stores this April!

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