Monthly Archive: October 2015

John Ostrander: Damn you, Stephen Colbert!

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On The Late Show on Thursday night, Stephen Colbert celebrated the Cubs winning the wild card spot in the MLB playoffs (they beat Pittsburgh) by declaring that the Curse of the Goat was now broken and that the Cubs would go on to win the whole enchilada.

Mr. Colbert, how could you? You lived in Chicago for eleven years. I know that, at that time, you studied improv with Charna Halpern and my old writing partner, Del Close. You know the dashed hopes and numbing despair experienced by Cub fans. And just when the Cubbies had won their first playoff game in Twelve Years, you had to flout the Curse of the Goat and even eject from your show a goat that had been in the front row of the audience. The goat clearly did not want to go but you had to repeat the incident that first brought the Curse of the Goat down on the Cubs.

For those of you who don’t know, back in 1945, when the Cubs made one of their few appearances in a World Series, saloon keeper Bill Sianis (owner of The Billy Goat Tavern, a famed watering hole in the lower level of Michigan Avenue), was ejected from Wrigley Field along with his pet goat. Some say the Cubs owner, Phillip K. Wrigley, objected to the smell. Of the goat or of Sianis, I’m not sure. Sianis swore that the Cubs would never win a World Series again (accounts differ slightly but that’s the gist of it). And they haven’t. Of course, they hadn’t won a World Series in the 40 odd years leading up to that but perhaps the curse was retroactive. Who knows with curses?

Sianis himself tried to reverse the curse in later years; all sorts of rituals and exorcisms have been done to no effect.

I’m a life-long Cubs fan, Stephen. I had no choice in the matter. I was born on the Northside of Chicago; that locks me into the Cubs. The Southside is for the White Sox and the West Side – well, who knows or cares. They’re free agents; they may support St. Louis as far as I know.

The Cubs have not won a World Series in 107 years. My aunt, who lived to be 101, was alive the last time the Cubs did that. She was barely one-year old. That’s how long we’ve been suffering and waiting.

Every so often, it looks as if our luck is going to change, that the Curse will finally be broken. In 2008, they had the best record in baseball. There wasn’t anyone the Cubs couldn’t beat. In the first round, they were swept by the Dodgers. Didn’t win even one game. The Goat laughed. Baaaa-ha-ha!

In 2003, they were in the playoffs against the Florida Marlins. They were leading three games to two, they were at Wrigley Field, they were leading 3-0 in the 8th inning with two out, and a fan named Steve Bartman, sitting in the front row on the left field foul line, saw a ball headed his way. Trouble is, it was a playable ball and the outfielder, Moises Alou, had a chance to catch it. Bartman made a play for it, too, and tipped the ball. Alou didn’t catch it and a collective groan went up from the Cubs’ fans in the stadium and watching it on TV. We knew the Curse has struck again. The Cubs went on to lose the game and the series. Bartman had to be escorted out of Wrigley Field by security for his own protection.

And somewhere the Goat laughed. Baaaa-ha-ha!

And you, on your show, proclaimed that the Curse of the Goat was now broken and guaranteed, Guaranteed that the Cubs would win it all this year. You should know better. You should respect the Curse, respect the Goat, and don’t start celebrating before the season is over.

If/when the Cubs fail again, Cub fans are going to remember you taunting fate, Stephen Colbert. You are going to be the new Bartman. Your ratings will plummet in Chicago. You won’t be able to come back to the city to visit old friends, not that it will matter; they will shun you and your hubris.

Of course, there is the possibility that you’re right. That slim, ephemeral hope that comes back to life every time that the Cubs enter the play-offs, that glimmer of possible victory that enters every true Cubs fan’s heart, may finally be realized. And you will have called it. You will be able to lead the Victory Parade down LaSalle amidst the cheering throngs.  It will be a great moment of victory and you can claim it because you called it.

And then what will happen?

The team’s owners, emboldened, will move the Cubs out of the friendly confines of Wrigley Field to a new stadium, possibly in the suburbs, possibly in another city all together. They will maximize their financial potential.

And, shorn of their identity as baseball’s most lovable losers, the symbol of futility and the unending patience of the true fan, the Cubs will become just another baseball team.

Damn you, Stephen Colbert!

 

Marc Alan Fishman The Right to Bear Arms

Ben-Carson

No, I didn’t spell that wrong. I just think all Americans should have the right to a free pair of bear arms. For protection. Or something. OK, I lied. I just like to be coy with my titles. But, as always, I digress.

A while back, in response to the “Religious Freedom and Restoration Act,” I’d likened the right-wing penned law as being worthy of super villainy. Now, I find myself once again questioning how the Grand Old Party has now become the party of Ultron, Lex Luthor, and Dr. Ben Carson.

Somewhere between Donald Trump desiring to build a wall to protect us from Mexican rapists, Carly Fiorina proclaiming Planned Parenthood as a secret fetus-selling black market, and Jeb Bush basically aping a parody of his own brother a la Aaron Sorkin (<a href=”

seriously), it’s sad that Dr. Carson’s recent verbal pile-ups haven’t awaken new ire in me, so much as deflated acceptance of the status quo. Forgive me for being political this week. But when Doctor Doom starts preaching at the pulpit, I find it near impossible to keep my pinko-commie lips shut. Blame my maker, Mike ‘Reed Richards’ Gold, esquire.

Dr. Carson, amongst several bouts of recent word vomit, has suggested in light of the continuous gun-related tragedies that our kindergarten teachers should be packing heat, and that the Holocaust could have been prevented had my ancestors been more like Frank Castle than Frank Zappa. Doctor Doom indeed.

Forgive me. Guns are bad, mm kay? Outside the sport (a term I use in the loosest of senses) of hunting, the need for a firearm just rubs my rhubarb. And for those folks who profess to the ideology that the ownership of a gun is their right, or that it’s paramount to their personal safety, I wholeheartedly believe no one has the right to take the life of another person. Period. And any instrument that is as potent as a modern firearm is simply way-too-easy means to ends no one should have the power to profess over another. But I know my place; my opinion is not law, nor should it be. Guns exist. They can’t unexist. So, we attempt to achieve balance.

Balance isn’t reached by arming the world with weapons. I cite Fiddler on the Roof:

“We should fight back! An eye for an eye… a tooth for a tooth!”

“Great. So the world should be blind and toothless, then?”

Dr. Ben Carson, and his conservative cohorts are playing a dangerous game. Fear-mongering. Hate-spreading. You know… Super-villainy. Put a gun in the hands of everyone, and we can live-out the end of Reservoir Dogs every time someone cuts us in line. That ought to cut down on the mass shootings, right Herre Viktor?

If we lived in the world of comic books, imagine how much worse it might be. If weapons discharged from people’s eyes, fingers, or anuses. If people could explode on demand. If violence was solved always with even more violence. If we believed Carson, the world of comic books would be the safest world possible.

And if that were true… Comic books would be a hell of a lot more boring.

The Law Is A Ass

Bob Ingersoll: The Law Is A Ass #372

SPIDER-MAN’S FIGHT WITH SANDMAN WAS FRAUD WITH PERIL

Ok, while it wasn’t enough to make him a threat or a menace, what Spider-Man did wasn’t very nice.

It was Mike Barr, a long-time friend and even longer-timed comic-book reader, who reminded me of this story. Mike’s a friend and comic-book reader of such long standing that when he said Spider-Man #4, I knew which comic he meant. When the long-timers say Spider-Man # 4, we only mean one book. We don’t need no steenkin’ adjectives. Or even volume numbers. For us the original The Amazing Spider-Man was Spider-Man and Spider-Man #4 can only mean what is now clumsily called: The Amazing Spider-Man v 1 #4.

In the middle of this story, the first appearance of the villain Sandman, said villain was running from the cops and decided to hide out in Midtown High School, which seems the perfect place to hide. Considering the level of intelligence Sandman’s shown over the years, I’m not sure anyone would ever think to look for him in a school. Unfortunately for Sandman, it wasn’t such a perfect hideout, after all.

If you’re a long-enough-time reader, such as Mike, or me and you get to call The Amazing Spider-Man # 4 by its nickname, you’ll remember that at this point in Spidey’s career he was still a high school student and Midtown High is the high school he attended. If you’re not, either read the Spider-Man wiki entry I’ve already linked to in this column or take my word for it.

Spider-Man and Sandman then had the story’s obligatory fight scene in the school. And – SPOILER ALERT! – Spider-Man won. Then Spider-Man remembered that he hadn’t taken any pictures of the fight scene, pictures for which Daily Bugle editor, J. Jonah Jameson would “pay a fortune.” That’s when Spider-Man decided to improvise.

Improvise, that is, if you mean by “improvise,” make stuff up. And seeing as how that’s what improvise means on Whose Line Is It Anyway? I guess I can mean that, too.

So Spider-Man set his camera up so that it would take pictures. Then he went to the fire bucket…

If you’re in the target Spider-Man age demographic that Marvel’s shooting for in 2015, you probably don’t remember fire buckets. Older buildings, of which schools are usually a subset, used to have fire buckets in them; buckets filled with sand. (Maybe they still have fire buckets in them. I haven’t seen one in quite a while, but I don’t know.) The intent was that someone could throw sand from the bucket on a small fire – particularly an oil fire upon which one shouldn’t throw water – and smother it with the sand.

…went to the fire bucket and grabbed a handful of sand. Spidey threw the sand into the air and dived through it, to make it look like he was fighting the sand. Then he threw another handful of sand into the air and punched it. I guess Spidey took it seriously when someone told him to go pound sand. Then Peter Parker sold the pictures of this “fight with Sandman” to Jameson for big bucks.

Wait, this was noted cheapskate J. Johan Jameson we’re talking about. Peter probably sold him the photos for chump change and a key to the employee wash room. And not even the executive washroom.

What Peter did when he sold Jameson those pictures was wrong. It was fraud. Don’t believe me. How about Noah Webster, would you believe him? He said fraud is an “intentional perversion of truth in order to induce another to part with something of value or to surrender a legal right.”

So let’s see. Peter acted intentionally; I mean I don’t think he threw the sand into the air and punched it by accident. He perverted the truth by faking pictures of Spider-Man’s fight with Sandman and passing them off as the real thing. And he induced J. Jonah Jameson to part with something of value. Hey, chump change and a key to the employee washroom have some value. Even if it’s not the executive washroom.

Still don’t believe me? Then would you believe the New York State Assembly, which made what Peter did a crime? For the purposes of New York’s fraud prosecutions NY Penal Law 170.00 defines a “written instrument” as “any instrument or article … containing written or printed matter or the equivalent thereof used for the purpose of reciting, embodying, conveying or recording information.” A photograph would be an “instrument” containing “printed matter or the equivalent thereof” used to convey information. That takes care of the appetizer, let’s move to the main course, Forgery in the third degree. NY Penal Law 170.05 defines said crime as “falsely mak[ing] a “written instrument” with “intent to defraud, deceive or injury another.” Peter falsely made a written instrument – photographs – with the intent to deceive Jonah and injure him by taking his money. That’s close enough for government work. And considering the police and prosecutors do government work, it counts.

Finally, if you don’t believe me, would you believe Peter himself? Because, in The Amazing Spider-Man# 4, he justified what he was doing by thinking, “Since this really happened a few minutes ago, it can’t be unethical! It’s like shooting a re-take of a movie!” Methinks when a man doth protest to himself too much, he knows he’s doing something wrong. Trust me, anytime someone thinks, “this can’t be unethical,” it is.

After all, if what Peter did – faking news stories – wasn’t wrong, people such as Brian Williams, Stephen Glass, and Jayson Blair would still have their old jobs. They don’t, so you can draw your own conclusions.

Of course, that’s nothing to what Peter did to Jameson in The Amazing Spider-Man #9, but that’s, literally, another story. And, maybe another column.

Martha Thomases: Tough Boss Women

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As I was getting on the plane to visit my son, the genius, in Los Angeles, I started to get on line at the same time as a petite African-American woman. Since I have a tendency to go charging through lines, I stepped back to let her go ahead of me (sometimes I can behave). And then, as so often happens on flights between the Big Apple and the Big Orange, I thought I recognized her.

I’m pretty sure it was Marianne Jean-Baptiste. I wanted to tell her how much I enjoyed her work, but, for the life of me (it was very early and I wasn’t yet caffeinated), I couldn’t remember if she was the tough-cop boss on Limitless or Blindspot.

For the record, she’s on Blindspot. The tough boss on Limitless is Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio. Which is too bad, because I think Limitless is a better show, and Ms. Jean-Baptiste seems like she deserves the better show. Here’s something she said: “The old men running the industry just have not got a clue … Britain is no longer totally a white place where people ride horses, wear long frocks and drink tea. The national dish is no longer fish and chips, it’s curry.”

Great, isn’t it? She was talking about movies and televisions (fields in which she has won many awards), but she might just as well have been talking about comics.

(Note: I think Limitless is better than Blindspot, at least so far, because the characters seem to be having more fun and the sexual attraction between the two leads seems less forced, by which I mean they might or might not be sexually attracted to each other, but they can still get the job done and have a good time doing it. Blindspot, in my opinion, sacrifices some interesting observations on the female lead in an attempt to give the male lead something to do.)

Comics has had tough boss women as characters in the books at least since Amanda Waller. Unfortunately, as with television and movies, there are more women bosses (and queer bosses and bosses of color) in the stories than in the real world.

I’m not saying this only because it would be nice of more women earned executive-level salaries. I mean, it would be nice, but it wouldn’t make a huge difference in the lives of most people. There aren’t that many executive-level jobs.

However, it would make a huge difference in the lives of the thousands of people who work in the industry if our interests were reflected in the corporate culture.

Comics, as a business, has never been that corporate. Even today, when the big studios either own or make deals with most of the companies, comics people are not very business-like. Certainly not compared to other print media, newspapers or magazines. Comics companies are fantasy factories, and that doesn’t require suits or ties.

That’s great. I’m in favor of comfortable shoes. However, too many comics companies have a parallel lack of professionalism when it comes to tolerating discrimination.

If you read the link (and please do), you’ll see a discussion of sexual harassment, a blight on our business. I’ve heard similar stories about tolerating racial intolerance, including editors accusing the only African-American intern of theft (note: It wasn’t him). And it’s only recently that casual homophobia was thought to be anything less than hilarious.

There’s a difference between discrimination and harassment, although they flow from the same source. Discrimination is more pervasively evil, I think, while harassment is more immediately frightening when it’s happening to you. People think they can get away with harassment because discriminations tolerated.

We shouldn’t tolerate it.

I don’t have a single answer for what to do. As a feminist, I see lots of nuances to consider (and, because I lack imagination, I found even more to think about when smarter people than me suggest things here.

My sense from reading the social media these last few weeks is that we aren’t tolerating it anymore. That’s a good thing.

And Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio is a wonderful actress, and I look forward to watching her every Tuesday.

The X-Files – The Collector’s Set Arrives for Christmas Giving

x-files-box-set-e1444310486452-5604435LOS ANGELES, Calif. (October 8, 2015) – The truth is out there…and now it can be found in its entirety when Twentieth Century Fox Home Entertainment exposes the complete world of The X-Files on Blu-ray for the first time – just ahead of the event series premiere Sunday, January 24, 2016. The X-Files: The Collector’s Set – featuring a slot for the upcoming six-episode event series – releases on December 8, giving fans the chance to own a piece of television history and one of the year’s must-have giftset collections. Fans can also purchase each season individually on Blu-ray on December 8.

Since its inception in 1993, The X-Files has remained a worldwide phenomenon, garnering a loyal cult following, 16 Emmys® and five Golden Globes® Awards, including “Best Dramatic TV Series” during its nine-season run.

Now for the first time, all nine exhilarating, groundbreaking seasons of The X-Files, along with special features, can be yours to own on Blu-ray! Although they began as reluctant partners, FBI special agents Fox Mulder and Dana Scully (Golden Globe®*** winners David Duchovny and Gillian Anderson) ultimately form a powerful bond as they struggle to unravel deadly conspiracies and solve paranormal mysteries.

The X-Files: The Collector’s Set features more than 23 hours of content across all nine seasons – perfect for catching up on the series before the new event series airs. Relive all the mythology, conspiracy theories with special features, including behind-the-scenes featurettes, and commentaries by executive producer Chris Carter (“Millennium,” “Harsh Realm”), R.W. Goodwin, Rob Bowman, Kim Manners, Frank Spotnitz, Robert Patrick and Rod Hardy.

“THE X-FILES” – THE COLLECTOR’S SET SPECIAL FEATURES

  • Season One
    • Series Intro by Frank Spotnitz
    • Chris Carter Talks About Season 1
    • Deleted Scenes
    • International Clips
    • Deep Throat: Audio Commentary by Chris Carter
    • Erlenmeyer Flask: Audio Commentary by R.W. Goodwin
    • Special Effects Clip From Fallen Angel
    • Documentary: “The Truth About Season 1”
  • Season Two
    • Deleted Scenes
    • Chris Carter Talks About Season 2
    • Humbug
    • Documentary: “The Truth About Season Two”
    • Duane Barry: Audio Commentary by Chris Carter
    • End Games: Audio Commentary by Frank Spotnitz
    • Anasazi: Audio Commentary by R.W. Goodwin
  • Season Three
    • Deleted Scenes (w/optional commentary by Chris Carter)
    • Chris Carter Talks About Season 3
    • International Clips
    • Special Effects with Commentary by Mat Beck
    • Documentary: “The Truth About Season Three”
    • Threads of Mythology: Abduction
    • Talitha Cuma: Audio Commentary by R.W. Goodwin
  • Season Four
    • Deleted Scenes
    • Extended Scenes
    • Special Effects with Commentary by Paul Rabwin
    • Deleted Scenes (w/optional commentary by Chris Carter)
    • Tunguska – Interview With Chris Carter
    • Paper Hearts – Interview with Vince Gilligan
    • Memento Mori: Audio Commentary by Rob Bowman
    • Introduction to Memento Mori by Chris Carter and Frank Spotnitz
    • Max: Audio Commentary by Kim Manners
    • Documentary: “The Truth About Season Four”
  • Season Five
    • International Clips
    • Deleted Scenes (w/optional commentary by Chris Carter)
    • Special Effects with Commentary by Paul Rabwin
    • Documentary: “The Truth About Season Five”
    • Threads of Mythology: Black Oil
    • FX Featurette
    • Introduction to The Post-Modern Prometheus by Chris Carter and Frank Spotnitz
    • Patient X: Audio Commentary by Kim Manners
    • The Red and the Black: Audio Commentary by Chris Carter
    • The Post Modern Prometheus: Audio Commentary by Chris Carter
    • The Pine Bluff Variant: Audio Commentary by John Shiban
  • Season Six
    • Special Effects with Commentary by Paul Rabwin
    • Deleted Scenes (w/optional commentary by Frank Spotnitz)
    • International Clips
    • Two Fathers: Audio Commentary by Kim Manners
    • One Son: Audio Commentary by Frank Spotnitz
    • Triangle: Audio Commentary by Chris Carter
    • Introduction to Milagro by Chris Carter and Frank Spotnitz
    • X-Files Profiles: Cigarette-Smoking Man
    • Featurette on Season Six
    • Documentary: “The Truth About Season Six”
  • Season Seven
    • Deleted scenes (w/optional commentary by Chris Carter)
    • Special effects sequences with commentary by Paul Rabwin
    • International Clips
    • Documentary: “The Truth About Season Seven” Behind-the-Scenes featurette
    • X-Files Profiles: A.D. Skinner and Samantha Mulder
    • Closure: Audio Commentary by Kim Manners
    • Documentary: “The Truth About Season Seven”
  • Season Eight
    • Special Effects by Mat Beck with Commentary by Paul Rabwin
    • International Clips
    • Deleted scenes (w/optional commentary by Frank Spotnitz and John Shiban)
    • Documentary: “The Truth About Season Eight”
    • Deleted Scenes with Optional Commentary by Chris Carter
    • Threads of Mythology: Colonization
    • X-Files Profiles
    • Within: Commentary by Kim Manners and Robert Patrick
    • Deadalive: Commentary by Frank Spotnitz
    • Vienen: Commentary by Rod Hardy
  • Season Nine
    • Deleted scenes (w/optional commentary by Frank Spotnitz)
    • Special Effects by Mat Beck with Commentary by Paul Rabwin
    • International Clips
    • Audio Commentary by Chris Carter, Vince Gilligan, John Shiban, Frank Spotnitz, Kim Manners
    • Documentary: “The Truth About Season Nine”
    • “The Making of ‘The Truth’”
    • “Secrets of The X-Files”
    •  “Tribute to The X-Files”
    • Threads of Mythology: Super Soldiers
    • X-Files Profiles
    • Reflections on the Truth Featurette
    • Wonder Con Panel

REVIEW: Arrow: The Complete Third Season

Arrow S3 3DArrow was the first serious approach to superheroics based on the DC Universe in quite some time. There was little risk picking a second tier character that some but not many may have known about. Producer Greg Berlanti assembled a team consisting of Marc Guggenheim and Andrew Kreisberg to sift through nearly 70 years of Green Arrow material and figure out how to turn it into a weekly series for the CW.

Once they figured out it was a story of redemption, of Oliver Queen’s journey from spoiled rich kid to a man avenging his father’s death and maturing into the man he was intended to be, they hit pay dirt. The series was rich with nods to the DCU and the adaptations from the source material served to make the show strong and fascinating.

They hit pay dirt with the casting of Stephen Amell as Queen but even better was the amazing chemistry he had with his supporting cast, notably Emily Bett Rickards, originally brought on for a bit role, but grew into the series’ heart and soul.

Season one was all about coming back to Starling City and Queen atoning for his sins and his alter ago, the Hood, reclaiming the metropolis. Season two was a journey towards becoming a hero as his support team grew, but the price that came with his newfound role was steep. Season three, out now on Blu-ray from Warner Home Video, was all about identity.

Across the 23 episodes, every member of the main cast had to reassess their role on the team, their connection to Queen, and their personal goals. We saw his kid sister Thea (Willa Holland) grow up, trained by her biological father, Malcolm Merlyn (John Barrowman), to become a capable fighter. We saw Sarah Lance (Caity Lotz) die in Merlyn’s game for power with his former liege, Ra’s al Ghul (Matt Nable), who had come calling to Starling City. Her death propelled her sister Laurel (Katie Cassidy) to stop her alcoholic spiral and train to become the new Canary, complete with sonic cry.

The season’s meta arc was Ra’s wanting Queen as his heir, to wed his daughter Nyssa (Katrina Law), and relocate to Nanda Parbat. The others had to protect the city while trying to help Queen. But there were many a distraction along the way. Queen Consolidated was bought out by Ray Palmer (Brandon Routh), renamed Palmer Technologies, and we watched the eager, affable Palmer build a suit of armor nicknamed A.T.O.M. to protect his city. More time was spent with the new spinoff series, Flash as members of that cast casually dropped by for teamups and shakes.

Additionally, there were side stories about Diggle (David Ramsey), his wife Lyla (Audrey Marie Anderson), and their Argus work which also involved the Suicide Squad.

As a result, things sprawled and grew diffuse, robbing Queen of the spotlight. His journey was constantly being obscured by everyone else’s. Even the main supporting team seemed to be losing screen time to other threads so across the season things were engaging but messy. What really hurt were the ludicrous flashbacks, taking Oliver Queen off his island exile and actually bringing him to Hong Kong and even a secret visit to Starling. If they are done with the island, maybe they should be done with the flashback device and move on.

By the end of the season, Arsenal (Colton Haynes) was gone, Laurel was accepted as the Black Canary and Thea suited up as Speedy. Palmer’s armor seemed to work better when he was miniaturized. And Merlyn is the new Ra’s al Ghul as his opponent Damian Darhk has set his sights on the ravaged Starling City – all of which sets up the new season beginning tonight.

The show has never looked stronger with terrific set designs for Nanda Parbat, sleeker, more appropriate costumes. The production and effects team deserve their kudos which come with some nice bonus material on the final disc

The high definition transfer is sharp and the sound good. The episodes are spread across four discs, each one with episode-specific deleted scenes. Disc four has a nice package of features starting with “Second Skins: Creating The Uniforms of Arrow”; “Nanda Parbat: Constructing The Villain’s Lair”; “The Man Beneath the Suit – Atom’s First Flight”; the ever-present Gag Reel, and the well-traveled Warner TV panel from 2014’s Comic-Con International (also found on several other releases this fall).

Tweeks: Dr. Oblivion’s Guide to Teenage Dating Vol. 1 Review

This week we review Dr. Oblivion’s Guide To Teenage Dating Volume 1, by Jeff Pina. It’s the first three sold out issues (plus extras & a couple one-shots) about Dr. Oblivion, super villain AND dad of a teenage daughter…who happens to be dating the town’s superhero. Spoiler Alert: We absolutely love it! But you’ll want to watch the video anyway because you’ll learn a couple things like how Maddy is very protective over Black Widow’s superiority over all other female comic role models and how Anya will find any excuse to talk about Park and Rec so that she can steer the conversation to Chris Pratt.

Oh, and by the way….here’s the link to read the first part of Dr. Oblivion’s Guide to Teenage Dating

Box Office Democracy: The Martian

I really enjoyed watching The Martian when I was sitting in the theater, but that love has faded quickly in the days since. There’s a high amount of amazing spectacle and suspense to keep audiences engaged but there’s an emotional emptiness to the film that makes it feel inconsequential in the long term and hurts the film. Ten minutes after I thought it was an Oscar contender released too early, two days after it feels like just another movie, and in a couple months I doubt I’ll be thinking about it at all. I suppose this is what Ridley Scott is these days and it’s so sad that the man who made Blade Runner and Alien is making such hollow science fiction these days.

The set pieces on display in The Martian are as good as anything I’ve seen this year. From Martian sandstorms to daring space stunts to random bouts of explosive decompression it’s a thoroughly arresting film. The action is interesting and it’s fun to hear all of the characters try and scheme their way out of impossible space problems. The interplay between Jeff Daniels, Kristen Wiig, Sean Bean, and Chiwetel Ejiofor is particularly crisp and feels if not what actual NASA meetings are like certainly what I would like to imagine them to be.

The problem with all these fascinating situations is we never get to see any real emotional reactions. Matt Damon is supposed to be almost certainly doomed millions and millions of miles away and with the exception of brief moments we never see him particularly sad or on the precipice of despair. We never see that reaction from anyone on earth either, neither from the people at NASA or from a member of his family, the stakes of the movie are so high but without seeing someone really care they don’t feel like anything. The Martian ends up feeling like a series of math problems to be solved and not like a life or death situation, and while approaching them like math problems might be what gets them solved from an institutional standpoint it doesn’t make for an effective movie.

There’s a chance I’m being too hard on this movie. It’s quite likely that “enjoyable but forgettable” actually describes a movie that’s more or less good, but I can’t help but hold Ridley Scott to a higher standard. I know he can make movies that are more affecting than this but seems trapped in a downward spiral of spectacle over substance that kicked off with Robin Hood, spread through Prometheus, hit critical mass with Exodus, and now has left us with The Martian a movie that barely seems to care about how little it cares.

Dennis O’Neil: Enough!

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So riddle me this: how do we react to another massacre? And yet, given the events of last week in Oregon, what else is worth reacting to?

I guess I’m with Obama and Colbert. The president said we’ve become numb and that’s not a bad observation. Stephen Colbert said that we’ve gotten good at pretending. Something horrific happens, something that could have been prevented, and the clergy and politicians and pundits make their noise and in a news cycle or two, we’re pretending it never happened.

Common sense suggests strategies that deserve exploration. (Gun registration could be administered as driver’s licenses are administered.) Lies get told. (The prez is sending minions in black choppers to take away your guns. The Dems are drafting laws to make firearm ownership illegal. There aren’t enough guns because one for every man, woman and child in the country isn’t enough.) Facts are ignored. (Other first world nations don’t suffer from our epidemic of gun violence.)

Research has shown that most people don’t change their minds even after they admit that the facts are against them. So appealing to sweet reason, it seems, is futile.

What isn’t?

The Point Radio: Melissa Fumero Still Smokin’ On BROOKLYN 99

It’s a new season of the Fox hit series BROOKLYN 99, and our favorite detective, Melissa Fumero, is along to talk about how her character is only slightly less neurotic (but still adorable) despite a few changes in the show this year. Then actress Illena Douglas shares the news on her month long hosting gig on Turner Classic Movies’ TRAILBLAZING WOMEN

We are off to New York Comic Con. Follow our exclusive coverage here on Instagram or on Twitter here.

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