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ComicMix Six: Worst Moments in Skrull ‘Invasion’ History

Yes, we’ve all heard the big news: Skrulls have invaded the world. They’re everywhere, hidden from magic and telepathy, ready to do their worst. They’ve infiltrated the highest levels of government and they’ve replaced all of our planet’s best and brightest with sleeper agents, ready to bring down all that we hold dear.

But that doesn’t mean you should be worried.

Here at ComicMix, we know that the Skrull Empire doesn’t exactly have the best track record. Heck, they once replaced Alicia Masters, one of the best friends of the Fantastic Four, with a Skrull agent, then seemed to forget she was even there until years later when she was found out — which led to the FF blowing up the biggest space station in the aliens’ Empire.

And that’s not even the tip of the Skrull Empire’s iceberg of ineptitude. For the first in our new series of ComicMix Six features, we present some of the Secret Invasion villains’ least-impressive diabolical schemes through the years.

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Ben Stiller Takes on ‘The Return of King Doug’ Graphic Novel

Reuters just reported that Ben Stiller’s production company, Red Hour, will partner with Dreamworks to produce a movie adaptation of the graphic novel The Return of King Doug.

I’m guessing many of you are thinking, "Wait, I’ve never heard of that book." And you probably haven’t, since it hasn’t been released. Once again, more evidence of the ridiculous popularity of comics properties in Hollywood right now.

The story says King Doug the graphic novel is set to come out some time next year. It’s so far off, in fact, that I can’t find any mention of it at publisher Oni Press’s Web site. The only description I can find of the project is that it’s a fantasy.

No word yet if Stiller will star. He’s currently working on a Night at the Museum sequel. Tropic Thunder, his next movie, comes out in August.

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Review: ‘Three Shadows’ by Cyril Pedrosa

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This book will break your heart; I warn you now.

Three Shadows
Cyril Pedrosa
First Second, 2008, $15.95

Louis and Lise are farmers somewhere quiet and untouched, doting parents to their small son Joachim. Their life is bucolic, idyllic: “Back then…life was simple and sweet. Everything was simple and sweet…The taste of cherries, the cool shade, the fresh smell of the river… That was how we lived, in a vale among the hills…sheltered from storms…Ignorant of the world, as though on an island…Peaceful and untroubled…Then everything changed.”

Three figures appear ominously one evening, on horseback at the horizon. Somehow, everyone knows that they’re trouble, but they can’t be confronted. They disappear into the mist, into the distance. Joachim’s dog Diego disappears, and the shadows use his barking to lure the boy – and almost get him.

So Lise goes to the nearest big town to consult with Mistress Pike, whose sign reads “Midwife. Exorcist. Sympathetic Ear.” The truth is what they fear most: the shadows have come for Joachim. And they’re not going to stop.

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The Oppression Olympics, by Elayne Riggs

As much as I’d like to use this column’s title to segue into a discussion about Beijing and Tibet and Stephen Spielberg and so forth, that’s not my chosen subject matter this time. Although I reserve the right to swipe my own header again once the XXIX Olympiad gets going. No, the title refers to the phenomenon of all kinds of different people believing, and loudly proclaiming, that systemic discrimination against the particular group with which they identify (and sometimes, if they’re "concern trolls," against a group of which they’re not a member but with which they’ve chosen to sympathize to the point of condescension) is "the last acceptable prejudice."

A few weeks ago, Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama wrote and presented his now-famous speech about dealing with questions of race as though citizens were, you know, adults. As hoped for, it started a lot of interesting discussions, as adults who’d been speaking about race and gender and privilege all along were once more thrust into the consciousness of others who hadn’t. One of the more interesting comments I read came from a Native American rights activist who was disappointed that the speech seemed to define the issue of race as, once again, mostly a black and white divide. While I believe Obama did include Asians and Latinos in his speech, I’m pretty sure Native Americans received no mention. However, I’m not prepared to ascribe this omission to deliberate exclusionism; any orator knows there’s a point where your rhetorical cadence gets bogged down by too many "and"s.

And yet, that commenter had a point. When we’re talking about rights and justice for everyone in this country, it’s not a good idea to leave out an entire series of cultures that flourished on this continent before Europeans came along, many of which have managed against all genocidal odds to continue to exist. Nor is it a good idea to belittle those same cultures in bad analogies. Even speeches about racial divides can’t "win" sometimes. It’s a tricky tightrope we all walk, ever since the days when "politically correct" was defined as "well-meaning (usually white) liberals who bend over backwards so much to include everyone that they wind up saying nothing at all." There were jokes about breaking down identity politics into such absurd subcategories one wound up worrying about catering to one-eyed left-handed lesbian Inuit vegans. At some point, most of these subcategories must be assumed to exist for purposes of receiving social justice, without needing to be the recipient of shout-outs at every single turn. (more…)

Charles Schulz’ Watchmen?

 

We could do one more fake post about the new movie novelization for kids, but you already know it’s April Fool’s Day by now.* So we’ll just post this piece from artist Evan Shaner, via Douglas Wolk at circletheglo.be, without further comment.

  • Besides, you’ll think we’re just funning you when we announce that Kyle Baker really is doing the kids version of Watchmen.

DC Direct Teams With My Little Pony

Thanks to a spy carefully cultivated at this year’s Toy Fair, we have this image from a new toy franchise/joint venture from DC Direct and Hasbro in anticipation of the Justice League film release.

Apparently, they think there will be a market for this Martian Little Pony. Ooookay…

‘The Dark Knight’ Viral Marketing Strikes Again!

 

Alternate Reality Games are the "it" thing in web marketing, especially for the upcoming The Dark Knight movie. Take, for instance, all of the activity we’ve reported on in the past surrounding the Harvey Dent campaign site. Well, they’re at it again.

For April Fool’s Day, a website launched for the Clown Travel Agency. A click on the envelope reveals a list of international locations and the message:

READY TO HAVE A BALL?

A SPECIAL BAG OF FUN AWAITS THE FIRST TO CLAIM IT, BUT YOU’D BETTER STRIKE FAST, THERE’S NO TIME TO SPARE!

Sounds like there’s a bowling theme at play here. If any Dark Knight detectives track the prize down, let us know!

Jon Sable, Freelance: Girl-fight!

It’s blonde vs. brunette on today’s brand-new episode of Jon Sable, Freelance: Ashes of Eden, by Mike Grell.

The stakes are higher than a date with a cute guy — the winner gets to decide to nuke New York!

Credits:Glenn Hauman (Colorist), Glenn Hauman (Assistant Editor), John Workman (Letterer), Mike Gold (Editor), Mike Grell (Artist), Mike Grell (Writer)

More: Jon Sable Freelance: Ashes of Eden

 

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Happy Birthday: Mr. Mxyzptlk

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An imp from the 5th dimension, Mr. Mxyztplk is an inveterate troublemaker and jester. Because he’s from another dimension, Mxyzptlk is not bound by our universe’s laws and can produce a variety of magical effects with a single thought.

Shortly after arriving on our world, Mxyzptlk encountered Superman, and the the imp has delighted in tormenting the Man of Steel ever since that first meeting. The only way to get rid of Mxyzptlk is to trick him into saying his own name backwards—this sends the imp back to the 5th dimension for at least 90 days.

It never lasts long, though, and soon Mxyztplk is back to tease and confuse Superman yet again.

 

‘Cul de Sac,’ the Comic Strip You Need to Read

I had all but given up on newspaper comic strips in recent years. My favorites (Calvin and Hobbes, The Far Side, Peanuts, etc.) had disappeared and every new innovative comic appeared online, not in the funny pages.

Then a friend pointed me to Cul de Sac by Richard Thompson of the Washington Post. Like many of the great strips, Cul de Sac features a young central character (Alice, in this case) who simultaneously looks at the world with the dreamy innocence of youth and the cynical sensibilities of an adult.

That balancing act is consistently funny on a daily basis, as Thompson finds the most creative ways to point out the lunacy of the world from both children’s and adult’s perspective. My favorite strip might be the one below, in which Alice’s brother opines on the world of comic books:

So, I have a new newspaper comics strip. Maybe the "funnies" page isn’t dead yet. Or maybe it is: I read Cul de Sac online.