NBC kicks off the new year by launching a new comedy from the producers of MODERN FAMILY. It’s hijinks in the White House on 1600 PENN and we talk to stars Josh Gad, Jenna Elfman and Bill Pullman on why critics have already elected this one a hit. Plus WALKING DEAD has a win and a loss, digital comics are red hot and we’re celebrating a birthday!

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According to many interpreters of the Mayan calendar, December 21, 2012 was to be the last day of the world. Were we going to go quietly, or in another Big Bang? No one knew. But some portents started happening as December matured.

A woman slept while a tornado ripped off her home’s roof.

More than 100 UFOs are seen along the India-China border.

A contestant on The Bachelor claims the producers brainwashed her.

Karen Berger resigns as Executive Editor of Vertigo.

And on December 9, 2012 (or thereabouts), Gail Simone is told her services as the writer of Batgirl are no longer required… via fucking e-mail!!!!!

Although I did once work at a hospital where the Director of Anesthesiology fired one of his staff via FedEx, and although Editor Mike Gold tells me that this is simply the snafu way that corporations use to rid themselves of the suddenly tainted, I personally think this is an unbelievably putrid, cowardly and totally unprofessional way to be axed, corporate or otherwise.

Gail Simone displays superb class; only tweeting I am very proud of what we accomplished with Batgirl and it was an honor to get to write Barbara Gordon again. Love that dame, as well as a longer post at her blog Ape In A Cape in which she thanks Scott Snyder, Bobbie Chase, Brian Smith, others at DC, and her fans for supporting her.

And the shit, in Newell’s unclassy words, hits the fan.

The comics world, not waiting for December 21^st,explodes!

Twitter accounts overload. E-mail boxes are stuffed. Phones ring off the work. Websites, (ComicMix, BleedingCool, Wired, The League of Women Bloggers, The Beat) are “hot off the presses” with the news. Fan forums are abuzz.

Friday, December 21, 2012.

What happens in the Bat-offices will most likely remain between Gail and DC, although there will sure to be many rumors spread by many pundits. Fan outcry? Pushback from other pros? Some even speculate that it was a massive marketing ploy…

Friday, December 21, 2012.

According to some expert on the Mayans and their calendar, the date did not signify the end of the physical world, but simply the death of one cycle and the beginning of another.

Friday, December 21, 2012.

And for one extremely talented and deserving woman, it sure was!

Friday, December 21, 2012.

Gail Simone tweets: Here’s the thing. Gail Simone is the new Batgirl writer. 

Hmm….

Maybe those Mayans were on to something. Congratulations, Gail!

But don’t breath easy yet, girlfriend. According to the Huffington Post, German scientist and Mayan calendar researcher Nikolai Grube says the 13^th Baktun (or cycle) may not actually be over until December 24, 2012.

That’s today, boys and girls.

TUESDAY MORNING (assuming there is one): Emily S. Whitten

TUESDAY AFTERNOON (assuming there is one): Michael Davis

Coming Soon!

Altus Press’ Matt Moring shared a pre-Christmas announcement!

Press Release:

The Masked Rider Archives Volume 1
By Oscar Schisgall and William H. Stueber
Introduction by Will Murray

Collected for the first time: the original Masked Rider series! Originally published by Ranger Publications, Altus Press has committed to collecting all the rare and illusive Masked Rider yarns from these early years prior to its acquisition by Standard Publications. Each volume will include new articles and information about the series as well as the history of Ranger Publications, one of the earliest companies run by Marvel Comics founder Martin Goodman.

Volume 1 contains the first three stories, uncut, in order, and accompanied by the original illustrations: “The Black Caballero” by Oscar Schisgall along with “The Avenging Shadow” and “Sapphire Mesa,” both by William H. Stueber.

Available soon!

Learn more at www.altuspress.com.

Art: George Sellas

New pulp Author Barry Reese unveiled the cover to his upcoming book, Gravedigger by artist supreme, George Sellas. Here’s a peek.

Keep watching All Pulp for more Gravedigger announcements.

The thing about a great story is that it can be told so many different ways. That includes the Greatest Story Ever Told and, at this festive time of year, my mind turns to the Christmas Story. I recently had a flash of (possibly divine) inspiration: how would it work as a sitcom?

Hear me out.

It would focus on a middle-aged Jewish carpenter named Joseph back in Roman times. I’m thinking Tim Allen for the part. He’s got this hot young fiancée named Mary (Megan Fox?) who is saving herself for marriage but then winds up pregnant – and not by Joseph. Well, Joseph’s all set to break off the wedding when he gets visited by the Angel Gabriel. I’m thinking Morgan Freeman or possibly Chi McBride (who was so good in being the smart butler to a daffy, horny Abraham Lincoln in “The Secret Diary of Desmond Pfeiffer” that aired for about three heartbeats back in 1998).

Not only is it God’s will that Joseph take Mary as his wife but, according to the doctrine of the Perpetual Virginity of Mary, Joseph can never have sex with her. At all. This would be a recurring gag. Joseph gets hot and horny and has to leap into a barrel of cold water to cool down. Maybe steam rises from the barrel. Trust me, this joke will never get old.

So the Romans order a census and Joseph has to go to Bethlehem, the city of David (because he’s descended from David) and get counted. Mary’s “great with child” which means she’s about to give birth at any moment. Maybe they got a late start, maybe Mary can’t move so fast or has to stop often, but by the time they get to Nazareth, everything is booked up. Lots of room for comedy there. One innkeeper (I’m thinking Richard Lewis, although Richard Karn who was in Home Improvement with Tim Allen could do it and audiences might like that) agrees to let them sleep in the barn out back.

Nowhere in any of the gospels or anything else I could find mentions a midwife. You think you would. Mary’s midwife would be a pretty important role. No mention. So – who has to do it? That’s right – Joseph. Tim Allen as Joseph. Can you see it? Alpha male having to deal with childbirth? Tons of humor to be mined there.

So while Mary is screaming and Joseph is ready to faint, Gabriel shows back up. He waves his fingers, Mary’s labor pain goes away (Gabriel claims it’s a divine epidural) and then – lo! – a great light shines ‘round about them coming from Mary’s womb. Enter Jesus.

I’m going to take a little artistic license here and suggest that he’s like the eTrade baby or the babies in the Guess Who’s Talking movies. The adults don’t react but it lets Baby Jesus comment on what’s going on. I always found young Jesus to be a little snarky, what with the “Don’t you know I’m supposed to be about my father’s business?” Jesus can play all sorts of tricks on Joseph, too, like change his wine into water.

In addition to the Innkeeper, there’s all sorts of wacky characters who can be brought in – shepherds wandering the fields at night, three Wise Men bearing gifts (maybe Joseph has to convince them that Jesus is the child they are seeking), and Mary’s Cousin Elizabeth can come for a visit (is it too much to hope for Carol Burnett? And maybe Tim Conway could play Elizabeth’s husband, Zachariah.).

I was contemplating the title. Modern Family is a popular show so I was thinking Ancient Family or Holy Family, but that doesn’t catch the flavor. I think Sweet Jesus! works. It could be pitched to the networks but HBO or Showtime might be looking for an edgy comedy. Or we could get Seth McFarlane interested and take it over to Fox. He’d animate it. Bill O’Reilly could denounce it on his show and when he cuts away for a commercial, there’s an ad for Sweet Jesus! I love it.

So, what do you think, Hollywood? I think we have a winner here. Have your people call my people. Wait. I don’t have people. Maybe Michael Davis could be my people; he’s always putting together deals. Hey, Michael – want to be my people?

And as Tiny Tim was heard to say, “God bless us everyone!”

MONDAY: Mindy Newell