Tagged: Glenn Hauman

Oh, The Place We Boldly Stop.

Oh, The Place We Boldly Stop.

The Dr. Seuss Enterprises lawsuit against us is finally over.

In August 2016, we put up a Kickstarter for Oh, The Places Youโ€™ll Boldly Go!, a mash-up of Star Trek and Dr. Seuss to be written by David Gerrold, drawn by Ty Templeton, edited by Glenn Hauman, and published by ComicMix LLC later that year. DSE sent us a cease and desist letter on September 27, 2016. (Yes, the legal wrangling lasted longer than the Enterpriseโ€™s original five-year mission.) DSE filed a DMCA motion to take down the Kickstarter campaign on October 7, and filed suit against us on November 10, 2016, alleging copyright infringement, trademark infringement, and unfair competition.

We put up a good fight. We defeated the trademark infringement and unfair competition claims, and that win was affirmed on appeal. We also won summary judgment on the claim of copyright infringement, though that was reversed on appeal. The court set a pretrial schedule in September 2021 and we were well positioned to have a jury resolve whether or not you could see this book.

And yet, today weโ€™re announcing that we and DSE submitted a proposed consent judgment for the suit, and that the Honorable Judge Janis L. Sammartino granted it on Friday, October 8, 2021 and closed the case.

Why? The simple truth isโ€” we ran out of time.

This past year, Ty was diagnosed with Stage 3 colorectal cancer. This has required him to undergo months of chemotherapy and radiation treatment, just to prepare him for the needed surgeryโ€”which will then require weeks of recuperation until he recovers enough to go through six MORE months of chemo and radiation, and then MORE surgery after that. This has affected his ability to work, to draw, and to do any of the things an immunocompromised person shouldnโ€™t do, especially in the middle of a global pandemic.

And the trial schedule would have been smack in the middle of all of that. After five years of sometimes ridiculous litigation and with the pre-trial deadlines looming, as Tyโ€™s collaborators and friends, we refused to put him through any additional stress that could in any way impinge on his health and recovery. To the credit of the people at DSE, they didnโ€™t want to put Ty through that either. So we joined in a motion to end the suit the day before Tyโ€™s surgery, in order to alleviate the less serious pain in his ass so he can deal with the far more lethal and literal pain in his ass.

In the consent judgment, DSE concedes some of our defenses and we concede some of their claims. Unfortunately, the terms stipulate that even though the book is complete, we wonโ€™t be able to present Oh, The Places Youโ€™ll Boldly Go! to you for another forty years, when the Dr. Seuss copyrights are set to expire and his books enter the public domain. (We can start taking preorders in January 2062, so set your calendar reminders now.)

We still passionately believe in and stand for creatorsโ€™ rights, including fair use, and we still maintain that Boldly is a fair use that could not have harmed DSE in any way, now, five years ago, or in forty years. Unfortunately, the Ninth Circuit Court of Appealsโ€™s view of fair use makes it very difficult to overcome a well-heeled copyright holding corporation if it wants to stand in the way (anyone who thinks โ€œcorporations are peopleโ€ has never seen a corporation in a cancer ward) and they decided that the book was over the line. Weโ€™re looking forward to the day when you can finally see the full book for yourself and make your own determination about itโ€”until then, itโ€™s like writing a book report by just looking at the cover, never seeing whatโ€™s inside.

It has been a long five-year mission filled with many absurdities. At one point, Universal Pictures asked us to help promote โ€œThe Grinchโ€ DVD release, so DSE could make more money to bash over our heads. At another point, DSE paid an โ€œexpert witnessโ€ who got an artist to redraw our book in the most dreadful way imaginable, and then did a trademark survey asking shopping mall customers to compare Tyโ€™s artful mix of Seuss and Trek with that hack job. Weโ€™re still wondering how our book referencing a single illustration from How The Grinch Stole Christmas could have taken โ€œthe heart of the work,โ€ as the Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals thought, when the illustration in question shows neither the Grinch, Christmas, or anything being stolen. And less than thirty-six hours after the Ninth Circuit reversed the fair use ruling, we got to watch Saturday Night Live air a sketch about the Grinch in a Whoville three-way, with nary a peep from DSE.

We’re also grimly amused about how we had to fight a fair use case while DSE’s own publisher, Penguin Random House, put out their own unauthorized parody, Oh , The Meetings You’ll Go To! (Although there is some question as to whether or not Meetings is officially sanctioned by Dr. Seuss Enterprises, as the copyright page of Meetings makes no mention of a DSE license, yet this since deleted tweet from Eric Nelson on August 4th, 2020 says otherwiseโ€ฆ)

But when we were sued two days after Election Day 2016, we knew that letting anyone with lots of money, name recognition, and power have the ability to shut down even the gentlest of parodies and mildest of commentaries about them unchallenged was an extremely bad precedent to set for the futureโ€”if for no other reason that we make up for one anotherโ€™s biases by being able to criticize each other, whether we are childrenโ€™s book authors or circuit court judges.

We can take satisfaction in many of the victories and precedents this case has set, including:

  • The Ninth Circuit made it explicit that mash-ups can be fair use. (Just not, apparently, ours.)
  • The District Courtโ€™s summary judgment ruling held that there are no exclusive trademark rights in an artistic style, or a distinctive font or typeface.
  • In fact, the trademark infringement and unfair competition claims wound up a total rout. They were dismissed based on nominative fair use in 2017. DSE renewed them, and we won judgment on the pleadings over its claims about the bookโ€™s title based on the Rogers/First Amendment test in 2018. We won the โ€œthatโ€™s not even a thingโ€ issue over the Seussian art style and typeface in 2019. And in 2020 the Ninth Circuit affirmed everything under Rogers and the First Amendment.

While weโ€™re not entirely pleased with the caseโ€™s outcome, we remember the words of historian Richard Hofstadter, who observed that sometimes people must โ€œendure error in the interest of social peace.โ€ If we were ultimately unable to persuade the Ninth Circuit to reduce the amount of error involved in determining fair use for creators, weโ€™ve done what we can to forge a path for future fair use activists.

There are many people weโ€™d like to thank for helping us go boldly, as we believe that, as our book says, no one goes forward alone. First and foremost: our lead attorney Dan Booth of Dan Booth Law, who fought the good fight with the strength of a hundred lawyers against a firm with four thousand lawyers. We also give thanks to Michael Licari, now in-house counsel at Veteran Benefits Guide, Dan Halimi, now at Halimi Law Firm, T.C. Johnston at Internet Law, Joanna Ardalan of OneLLP, who appealed our case to the Supreme Court, and Ken White of Brown White & Osborn LLP, who sent up the Popehat signal that brought us much needed assistance in the first place. And we thank Dr. Joshua Gans, our expert witness, who generously donated his time and testimony and worked under ridiculous constraints.

Weโ€™d also like to thank the people who filed amici briefs taking our side:

Francesca Coppa, Stacey L. Dogan, Deborah R. Gerhardt, Leah Chan Grinvald, Michael Grynberg, Mark A. Lemley, Jessica Litman, Lydia Loren, David Mack, William McGeveran, Mark P. McKenna, Lisa P. Ramsey, Pamela Samuelson, Jessica Silbey, Rebecca Tushnet, Magdalene Visaggio, the Electronic Frontier Foundation, the Organization For Transformative Works, Public Knowledge, and their counsel Chris Bavitz, Mason Kortz, Phillip R. Malone, Meredith Rose, Eric Stallman, and Kit Walsh.

And weโ€™d like to also thank Mike Gold, Martha Thomases, Brandy Hauman, Keiren Smith, Pam Hauman, Shann Dornhecker, Mark Treitel, Joshua Masur, Katherine Trendacosta, Heidi Tandy, Meredith Rose, Brian Jay Jones, Mike Godwin, Margot Atwell, Camilla Zhang, Oriana Leckert, Allison Adler, Michael C. Donaldson, Film Independent, the International Documentary Association, and Steve Saffel.

Weโ€™d very much like to thank United States District Judge Janis L. Sammartino, who presided over our case with patience, fairness, wisdom, and thoughtfulness, and all of the staff that supported her.

And finally, weโ€™d like to thank all of the Kickstarter backers who wanted to make this book a reality, all the supporters who helped cover (the start of) our legal expenses, and all of the journalists and scholars who followed and reported on our case. We are grateful for your generosity and faith, and are very disappointed that we canโ€™t show you what youโ€™ve been waiting years to see. At least not yet.

For those interested, the case is Dr. Seuss Enterprises LP v. ComicMix LLC et al.,; case number 3:16-cv-02779 in the United States District Court for the Southern District of California, and case number 19-55348, in the United States Court of Appeals for the Ninth Circuit.


P.S.: Thereโ€™s two more last minute โ€œthank yous.โ€ The proposed consent judgment was submitted this past Tuesday, October 5. On Wednesday, October 6, Ty had his surgery, which went well. And on Thursday, October 7, two guys joined David and Glenn in sending get-well notes to Tyโ€”a Mr. Shatner and a Mr. Takei.

Thanks, captains.


Mike Gold: Neal Adamsโ€™ The Brave and the Bald

head-explode-2633420

neal-adams-batman-elmer-fudd-5073699green-lantern-green-arrow-80-1-6202652Would you like to know how to make a baby boomer fanboyโ€™s head explode?

O.K. That was a trick question. There are plenty of ways to make a baby boomer fanboyโ€™s head explode. Itโ€™s our fault, really. Many of us had children. But I digress.

One way to make a baby boomer fanboyโ€™s head explode is to ask him (well, I said fanboy) which Neal Adamsโ€™ project is his favorite. My knee-jerk response would be Green Lantern / Green Arrow #80 for personal reasons, and The Spectre #3 (the one from 1968) to prove Iโ€™m still a fanboy at heart.

That is, until last week. Now Iโ€™ve got a clear favorite. And itโ€™s not a comic bookโ€ฆ although it is about a comic book. And a damn good one at that.

Last week, our pal and mystical production overlord Glenn Hauman, who occasionally writes something or other here at ComicMix when heโ€™s not busy being killed off in New Pulp short stories (weโ€™ll tell you about that some other time), sent โ€œusโ€ a link. In this case, โ€œusโ€ is the Imperial Council of ComicMix Wizards and Schleppers (ICCWS). The link was to something that was just getting some traction in the ethersphere. And, obviously, it concerns Neal Adams.

Background: About a month ago, DC Comics released their second set of super-hero crossovers with the famed Warner Bros cartoon characters, due to their common ownership. Maybe weโ€™ll define โ€œcommonโ€ some other time. Among these new titles was a one-shot produced by Tom King and Lee Weeks titled Batman / Elmer Fudd Special #1, implying someday there will be a second issue.

And maybe that will happen. I hope so. It was terrific. I ran around telling people โ€“ and co-workers โ€“ that they should read it. It had a real story, it was clever as all get-out, it was perfectly drawn, and if the reason you passed on it because you thought it was stupidโ€ฆ you were mistaken. It is the opposite of stupid. Of course, my fellow comics readers looked at me as though I had two heads. Whereas this may be the case and I got used to it decades ago, I donโ€™t think I ran into anybody else who read it at the time.

spectre-3-1833545shadow-1-adams-2446034Except Neal Adams.

And Neal didnโ€™t simply read it and take it up as a cause. Nope. No way. Neal actually turned it into a full cast audio play that was illustrated with Weeksโ€™ art from the Special. I didnโ€™t do an A/B comparison, but I think Neal used all the art in the book. And, in its own way, Nealโ€™s production was just as clever as the comic book.

Neal did much of the voice work, and itโ€™s first rank. As a radio guy since shortly after Nixonโ€™s inauguration, I think Iโ€™ve developed something of a trained ear for this sort of thing. Iโ€™m no Mark Evanier (Mark directed voice work from the likes of June Foray, Stan Freberg and Frank Nelson), but I know good. And Nealโ€™s good. So good he might have made a serious career mistake.

Well, no. Thatโ€™s crap. Nealโ€™s a well-respected and much-desired cartoonist for good reason. But his โ€œadaptationโ€ of the Batman / Elmer Fudd Special was an absolute delight. So was the comic book. Enjoy them both.

Whereas it would be wrong for me to reprint the comic book here โ€“ something about copyrights โ€“ I can make it easy for you to <a href=”

see and hear Nealโ€™s adaptation.

Neal did justice to Tom and Leeโ€™s story. And to Batman and to Elmer Fudd.

Go figure!

 

Mike Gold: Randomoniumโ„ข

bat-child-1458862As I type these words, today is today. Usually, today is yesterday or a day before or so, and if any of our other columnists pulled this stunt Iโ€™d be bitching my brains off. But, to paraphrase stand-up philosopher par excellence Mel Brooks, โ€œitโ€™s good to be the king editor.โ€

I do have an excuse, and a good one at that. I just got back from Manhattan Island where we had a wonderful dinner with the classy part of ComicMix, The Tweeks, a.k.a. Maddy and Anya Ernst. Oh, yeah, their mom Jen was there as well โ€“ even in New York City, letting even adult-looking underagers wander about is frowned upon. The โ€œusโ€ part consisted of four members of the ComicMix crew โ€“ Tweeksโ€™ producer and associate editor Adriane Nash, columnist Joe Corallo, utility infielder Wizardly Glenn Hauman, along with the amazing Brandy Hauman who hangs around with us to show us what itโ€™s like to have a real job, and the oft-aforementioned geriatric boy editor.

Yeah, thatโ€™s my superhero name. Geriatric Boy. It fits me like a glove. And if it donโ€™t fitโ€ฆ But I digress.

We had a wonderful time. Well, at least I did, but I donโ€™t think the others were faking. We stayed so long the restaurant manager sorta suggested they wanted the opportunity to make money off of some other folks. We stood in front of the place jabbering for another hour.

We talked about the stuff you might think a gaggle of ComicMixers would discuss: Star Wars, Doctor Who, food, architecture, theater, improv, opera (a little bit), comicsโ€ฆ Jen and I talked about Chicago because thatโ€™s what people who lived in Chicago always do. Hell, we do that when weโ€™re only around New Yorkers as well. It seems to annoy the pettier of our east coast clan.

Iโ€™m not going to rat anybody out, and Iโ€™m certainly not going to discuss Maddy and Anyaโ€™s career plans or anything like that. Not only would doing so be rude of me, but Iโ€™d also be pre-empting material from The Tweeksโ€™ weekly (if not more often) video blogs. If I did that, Adriane would roll up a copy of the Sunday New York Times and bop me on the nose with it, shouting โ€œbad editor โ€“ bad editor.โ€

Sigh. I hate being a grown-up. Lucky for me, I only do that for a living. And even then, rarely.

Maddy, Anya and Jen live in Orange County, which makes going to that ridiculously overstuffed comic book convention fairly easy โ€“ for them. The show is in several weeks, and if you look through the website you can see the high quality of their interviews with celebrities and other people who hire public relations firms. All of them (I believe) are online here at ComicMix, and itโ€™s really fun to watch how theyโ€™ve evolved and improved since they started this thing three years ago. When they were eleven. Now, theyโ€™re fourteen.

If the Tweeks are any indication, theyโ€™re making smarter and more stylish fourteen-year-olds than they did when I was that age. Oh, sure, I was smart all right, but in my case, that word qualified the next word, which was โ€œaleck.โ€

Iโ€™m a big believer in mentoring. Indeed, when it comes to such activity I am a fundamentalist. Iโ€™m really proud of Adrianeโ€™s work in that regard โ€“ and that is the result of her work and not her being my daughter. Which, need I remind you, has been the coolest thing that ever happened to me.

This is not to take anything away from the Tweeksโ€™ parents. Parenting is a different thing from mentoring. Mentors can say โ€œSee ya!โ€ when they want to or need to. Parents have their gig forever. I dunno; maybe itโ€™s something to do with โ€œresponsibility.โ€

It was a great evening. It was the reason I really love this job.

Happy summer solstice. If it seems like the longest day of the yearโ€ฆ trust your instincts.

 

 

 

 

ComicMix Vindicated in Dr. Seuss Lawsuit Over Literary Mash-Up; Judge Dismisses Trademark Claims, Copyright Claim Will โ€œBoldly Go Forwardโ€

On Friday, June 9, the United States District Court for the Southern District of California partially granted ComicMix LLCโ€™s motion to dismiss the Dr. Seuss estateโ€™s copyright and trademark infringement lawsuit over the book Oh, the Places Youโ€™ll Boldly Go!ย  To prevent publication, Dr. Seuss Enterprises, LP filed the lawsuit in 2016 against the bookโ€™s publisher ComicMix, its author David Gerrold, illustrator Ty Templeton, and Glenn Hauman, ComicMixโ€™s co-founder and vice-president.

United States District Judge Janis Sammartino dismissed the trademark claims under the doctrine of nominative fair use, and largely agreed with ComicMixโ€™s position that fair use protects the book from copyright infringement claims. Judge Sammartino found that the book is โ€œa highly transformative work that takes no more than necessary [from Dr. Seussโ€™s books] to accomplish its transformative purpose and will not impinge on the original market for Plaintiffโ€™s underlying work.โ€ She emphasized that the case has broader significance: โ€œThis case presents an important question regarding the emerging โ€˜mash-upโ€™ culture where artists combine two independent works in a new and unique way. โ€ฆ Applying the fair use factors in the manner Plaintiff outlines would almost always preclude a finding of fair use under these circumstances. However, if fair use was not viable in a case such as this, an entire body of highly creative work would be effectively foreclosed.โ€

As an example, Judge Sammartino refers to this image:

oh-the-places-youll-boldly-go-19-550x356-4956892

Plaintiffโ€™s work depicts two similar-looking, fanciful โ€œZaxโ€ creatures arguing in the middle of a desert, with footprints to mark their arrival. Boldly takes the same desert landscape and footprints, and in the fanciful creaturesโ€™ place puts two similar-looking beings of seemingly Vulcan descentโ€”one of which is drawn in the same position as his Dr. Seuss counterpart and one of which is transformed from the Dr. Seuss creaturesโ€™ aggressive stance into a contemplative poseโ€”deep in the midst of playing some type of alien board game. Additionally, Boldlyโ€™s text reveals that the two Vulcan creatures are, in fact, the same person, unlike Go!โ€™s distinct โ€œNorth-Goingโ€ and โ€œSouth-Goingโ€ Zaxes. Boldly therefore transforms the argumentative Zaxes and their corresponding depiction into a cloned Vulcan matching wits with himself over an alien boardgame. One Vulcan is positioned almost identically to his Zax counterpart to โ€œconjure upโ€ the Dr. Seuss work, while the other Vulcan is drawn anew and a board-game added in order to fully accomplish the workโ€™s overall transformative purpose.

The copyright claim survives, awaiting proof of any harm to the Dr. Seuss estateโ€™s licensing opportunities, and the estate was given two weeks to amend its trademark claims.

Dan Booth of Booth Sweet LLP, ComicMix LLCโ€™s lead counsel, said, โ€œI have never seen a case so focused on mash-up culture โ€” and so strongly supportive. Judge Sammartinoโ€™s decision implicates not just literary hybrids but music remixes, appropriation art, supercut videos, and more, strongly suggesting that they should be protected from copyright claims.โ€

Oh, the Places Youโ€™ll Boldly Go began as a highly successful Kickstarter campaign, written by Gerrold, a Hugo and Nebula Award winning science fiction author perhaps best known for writing the Star Trek episode โ€œThe Trouble With Tribbles.โ€ย  Ty Templeton is a veteran Eisner Award winning comics artist known for his work on Batman, The Simpsons, and as the co-creator of the Vortex Comics series Stigโ€™s Inferno.

ComicMix publishes a line of graphic novels by some of the best new and established talent in the industry.ย  ComicMix Pro Services works with creators to produce, publish and market their work in a competitive marketplace.ย  In addition, ComicMix runs one of the Internetโ€™s most popular pop culture news sites.

Hey Kids! What Time Is It?

howdy-doody-birthday-6245928

A long time ago in a reality far, far away, a small child was placed in an experimental rocket ship so that he and he alone (sort of) could escape his dying home planet. As such, he became the last of his people (sort of) and, when he landed on the planet Earth he was imbued with powers and abilities far beyond those of mortal menรขย€ยฆ as well as several mortal women.

This is not the story of that man.

Today, Glenn Hauman is just three years shy of a half-century. Born barely before the first lunar landing and the Woodstock festival that wasnรขย€ย™t even in Woodstock (and nor was Glenn), the child started growing and as far as science can discern, he has yet to stop.

Armed with a mind that never stops churning that is fueled by the heart of a saint, Glenn took his massive aptitude to the wonderful world of geekdom. He is, has been and someday will be again a writer, and his output includes many Star Trek and X-Men prose stories. (Note: รขย€ยœproseรขย€ย is like comic books, but they are lacking in art, color and balloons.) Heรขย€ย™s a publisher, a website creator, something of an editor, and easily the best production manager the comics world has seen in decades.

Heรขย€ย™s also a rabid liberal who, in 1997, sued Attorney General Janet Reno over the Communications Decency Act, an early attempt to impose government censorship onto the Internet. This one went all the way to the Supreme Court, where all nine justices sided with Glenn (and the ACLU) and against the Congress and the White House.

howdy-doody-7146124Somehow, Hauman was lucky enough to convince a woman way above his reach to take his hand, and much of the rest of his body, in marriage. People who have grown tired of Glenn still hang around to appreciate Brandyรขย€ย™s presence.

During his term at DC Comics, he met a handsome and debonair aging hippie who, in the words of Jim Shooter, could sell refrigerators to Eskimos. The record is not clear: either they teamed up or Glenn was kidnapped. Or, perhaps, blackmailed. Most likely, all three. Together they worked to create all sorts of projects that were as befuddling as they were unique.

No one knows that manรขย€ย™s name. Glenn would be well rid of him, if only he could. But the two of them, joined by people such as Brian Alvey and Martha Thomases, found ComicMix LLC, which, since you are reading these words, remains extant.

We wish Glenn the best on his birthday, particularly now that heรขย€ย™s officially pushing 50.

ย 

Marc Alan Fishman: New York, New Sales, New Aggravation

So Unshaven Comics finds itself once again in the loving bosom of the Javits Center and the New York Comic Con. As I reminded you last week, Unshaven split its booth space with ComicMix in 2013. This year we split with the lovely Jim McClain of the Solution Squad (and subsequently Reading With Pictures). As of this writing ยญโ€“ literally being written hours before you are likely seeing it posted โ€“ Unshaven has had some significant ups, and some hilarious downs. Letโ€™s list them until Iโ€™ve wasted enough of your time.

Up: Sales!

Itโ€™s always good to see a rise in sales. Given our booth placement (ahem, Marvel-Adjacent) we figured weโ€™d either be in the money or left drowned by lines, crowds, and cheeringโ€ฆ and find ourselves in Bone City. Luckily for us, Marvel erected a large wall across from our table. This houses their crowds well enough, and allows us ยญยญโ€“ with a little strain ยญโ€“ to be heard. And when we have someoneโ€™s ear, according to my data, weโ€™re 40% likely to get that sale. We love those odds. And suffice to say since we learned to upsell our typical single comic to a four-book pack (which includes some freebie swag weโ€™re willing to lose profit on to bolster a larger book sale), weโ€™re seeing far more than the 10% growth in books moved that we seek as a baseline for a return con visit.

Down: Pitches!

Data is Unshaven Comicsโ€™ friend. It allows us to transcend anecdotal feelings, and instead supply ourselves with factual evidence when it comes to figuring out if a convention is doing us well or kicking our keister. With that being said, I am sad to report New Yorkers arenโ€™t the nicest people weโ€™ve dealt with. In the same amount of time spent on the show floor, Unshaven Comics is pitching about 20% less than we did at C2E2, or Wizard World Chicago. NYCC boasts traffic on the floor greater than both Chicago shows combined. The simple fact is that people are on the move at this convention. More movement means less fine folks to pitch to.

Up: New Fans!

As I mentioned above, seeing such a high closing rate is compounded by the fact that 90% of our sales are to new faces. New faces to me, proves several fun notions. It stands to argue that seeing new folks continually buy our liโ€™l rags proves our product (and likely our passion and pitch) are worth their mettle. It also stands to consider then that the audience for sequential fiction isnโ€™t on the outs like some would have you believe. While yes, Iโ€™m sure DC and Marvel and the like arenโ€™t thriving on the racks like they used to, with the continuing growth of the convention scene, weโ€™re seeing a real change to the shape of the market at large. While fans may not flock to the local comic shop every Wednesday as weโ€™d all hopeโ€ฆ New York Comic Con continues to instill in me the idea that maybe the fans are just more apt to explore and sample when they can meet creators face to face.

Down: Our Old Friends! Buses! The Price of Tater Tots!

OK, call this my little rib and stick at those we know and love (and New York at large). Weโ€™re two days into the convention, and no one save for Media Goddess herself, Martha Thomas, has made pains to say hello. While our editor Mike Gold dined with Debutantes and Dames at the Puck Building Party, and other East Coast Corroborators did whatever it is they do, theyโ€™ve not even waved a โ€œHi, and go ยญhugยญ yerself!โ€ to we bearded lads. And on top of it, tonight I paid two dollars to upgrade my fries to tater tots, only to be given five of them as a serving. Sorry New York, Chicago understands portion size. And before some crazy Yankees fans point me to Mannyโ€™s or what-have-you, Mid Town and sore asses arenโ€™t conducive to jaunts elsewhere. But I digress.

Ups, Down, and All Arounds:

Ultimately, New York Comic Con thus far has been everything weโ€™d hoped it would be. Our sales are tracking on point as desired. Matt and I have enjoyed a few commissions. Our tablemate Jim is learning some valuable lessons (and apparently eating a hell of a lot better than us). And our hosts, the lovely Glenn and Brandy Hauman have been nothing short of perfect inn-keepers. We remain hopeful with two days left on the show floor, the best is yet to come.

Once again, Unshaven Comics would like to remind you they are at booth 1361, and could sure use some extra business to make life dandy. Stop by and mention this article? And Marc will personally thank you, and toss in some free swag with your book purchase.

ย 

Mike Gold: The Internet โ€“ Meet Your New Bossโ€ฆ

doctor-doom-7257850The thrill is gone / The thrill is gone away / The thrill is gone baby / The thrill is gone away โ€“ Roy Hawkins and Rick R. Darnell

I was going to write about something else today. Actually, I had several topics to choose from. Then I had a conversation with Glenn Hauman, the invisible hand of ComicMix, and then this screed shot out of my fingers.

As this new medium flourished, I was excited about the opportunity for anybody to communicate in virtually all ways (print, audio, video; instantly, eventually, historically) and to do so directly without outside interference. As Iโ€™ve said before, I am a first amendment absolutist: people should be able to express themselves the way they want, in the form they want, using the language they feel most appropriate. The Internet, I felt, allowed all of us to communicate without these ridiculous and unwarranted barriers.

Sure, thereโ€™s a price to pay. Thereโ€™s a lot of bullshit out there, options and outright lies presented as fact. And the rush to judgment that we see on cableโ€™s 24 hour โ€œnewsโ€ channels (which, oddly, donโ€™t offer very much in the way of news) is exceptionally prevalent. I literally come from the โ€œIf your mother says she loves you, check it outโ€ school of journalism. But those are growing pains, and the outrageous lies and distortions generally are limited to sites where they wear their prejudices on their sleeves. I donโ€™t except a eulogy about the three teenagers Hamas slaughtered in Israel to appear on an American Nazi Party website. Or vice versa.

I donโ€™t want or need big business or the government โ€“ any government โ€“ to tell me what I cannot sayโ€ฆ to the extent that thereโ€™s a difference between the two. But it didnโ€™t take very long before big business did exactly that by banishing that which they find objectionable from their services.

Ironically, for me this started with Apple. They do not distribute magazines or books that they find violates their standards. Do they have the basic right to do this? Of course. Itโ€™s their tubes and wires. But they enforce these standards in a hypocritical manner. There is a ton of music, television and movies for sale on iTunes that Apple would not sell in electronic print form on iBooks, had that content been presented in that medium. And if the object in question is from a big name author or has an enormous amount of buzz about it, well, often it manages to be listed on their service anyway.

Does this differ from, say, WalMart? Noโ€ฆ except that WalMart (et al) is consistent. If it doesnโ€™t meet WalMartโ€™s standards, popularity or mass-salability doesnโ€™t enter into it. Playboy could have an interview with Jesus Christ and WalMart wouldnโ€™t stock it.

And then we have Google.

Google may very well be the Doctor Doom of the Internet. They have so much information on each and every one of us that the National Security Agency actually tapped (taps? whoโ€™s to know?) Googleโ€™s files in their spying-on-the-citizenry jag. Thatโ€™s bad and ugly and evil, but for the purpose of this particular column it illustrates their corporate culture.

If Google divines what youโ€™re posting is objectionable, they de-list you. In fact, this almost happened to ComicMix. If youโ€™re de-listed by Google, you are screwed. You are left alone in outer space, where nobody can hear you scream.

Thereโ€™s a good graphic novel in that. But I doubt Apple and Google and their fellow travelers would allow you to use their tubes and wires to sell it.

โ€œMeet your new boss,โ€ Pete Townshend famously wrote. โ€œSame as your old boss.โ€

And I wonโ€™t get fooled again.

Marc Alan Fishman: I Am Hook, LaForge, and Wolverine.

Every so-often, the social media circuit regurgitates little worthless surveys. Perhaps your news feed is clogged with them? While I appreciate Facebook’s hide feature… frankly, I just scroll past then without a thought. Except when I โ€“ the ego-driven ne’er-do-well I am โ€“ determine that yes, indeed I must know which Disney Villain I am. And a few minutes later, I’m delivered output as thorough, reputable, and savory as a strip-mall psychic’s buy-one get-one reading. I figured as I had nothing to bitch about this week (unlike the feminists, legends, and/or afrofuturists that share column space with me) I might as well take a few of the quizzes for you, my adoring public. Allow me to help you figure out the absolute amazing enigma that is Marc Alan Fishman.

 

I am Randy Savage. Faced with the notion of Which Old School Pro Wrestling Legend Are You? I was quite pleased to be told I am the Macho Man. Aside from being the single greatest pitch man for salty meat sticks ever, Randy Savage was widely known amongst wrestling fans as the smart-mans Hulk Hogan. I’d like to think that I too am more a technical talent โ€“ suited more for the thinking my way out of a situation rather than with brute force โ€“ and that my passion seeps out of my pores. That… and I’d look amazing in a rhinestone cowboy hat and matching robe with wings. OH YEAH!

 

I am Michael Stipe of R.E.M. That’s me in the corner. That’s me in the spot. Light. Losing my religโ€“ sorry. When faced with Which 90’s Alt Rock Dude Are You? quiz,ย  it’s fitting I’d get someone considered tame in comparison to the others I could have been. Stipe is a thinker, not a drinker. He and his band represented a shift toward arty music videos, and lyrics that might make you think. He was angsty, which I can be from time to time. But beyond much else? Michael Stipe is a man of solid convictions. I’d like to think I’m getting there. I should note he also wrote a song about Andy Kaufman, and I loved Andy Kaufman. So, there’s that.

 

My Disney Best Friend is Pascal from โ€œTangledโ€. Well, the Internet can’t be right all the time. Or maybe it is? Frankly, I’ve not seen the Disney flick in question. According to the results though โ€œYou’ve got a dream and you just want to explore the world and live a little.โ€ And you know what? That’s actually very true. I do have a dream that The Samurnauts, and my lil’ company, Unshaven Comics, would be successful. And through that success we might just get to see a bit more of the world than we currently do on nights, weekends, and occasional holidays. And if that means a weird spiral tailed lizard is along for the ride? So be it.

 

I am Ron Weasley. Well, I don’t have a ton of siblings (in fact I have none). But I did wind up with a detail oriented muggle, and our child is adorable. I’d like to think my parents could provide better for me than a busted-ass wand, and rat for a pet. At the end of the semester though, I am a loyal friend, and fierce in defense of them when the going gets tough. Per the quiz I am โ€œthe funny one in your group of friends, but sometimes you use humor to hide your insecurities.โ€ And well, what can I say? I am Michael Stipe. So, I’m sure there’s times when I let my insecurities be buried. But hey, Everybody Hurts.

I am Comic Book Guy. Look kiddos, I swear, I didn’t plan this. But in the grand scheme of Springfield? Well, I can’t complain. I am sarcastic when push comes to shove. I covet trinkets, gadgets, and the like. And if I were to have a heart-attack, I imagine I too would envision how to best pose dramatically before kneeling before Zod. Cheeseburgers and loneliness do make for a terrible combo. Lucky for me I married my own Agnes Skinner long ago. I must hope though, that my scion turns out better than Seymour. Best. Outcome. Ever.

 

I am Leonard Hofstader. Oddly enough, it seems fitting. When I look to Unshaven Comics as my real-life Big Bang Theory gang, it’s clear to me at least that I am leader by default. That being said, that means Kyle is Sheldon, and Matt is Howard. Which is really strange, since Matt isn’t jewish. Kyle, I should also add, may be particular in his nature… but no where near annoying. But I digress. โ€œStraddling the line between sweet and sarcastic, you can transition between social circles with ease.โ€ I couldn’t put it better myself. Growing up, I was a nerd. Hell, I still am. But within any other circle โ€“ be they jocks in gym class, my fellow choir-geeks, or the arty-kids… I was never at a loss for words or good humor. I’d like to note though: I can handle dairy products just fine.

 

I am Kirk. Well, what more would I say to that? Much like Leonard, my Kirk-ness is embolden to my natural leadership qualities. I’d like to think that I tend to surround myself with a talented crew who make me look better. Like here at ComicMix for example. Mike Gold, my Spock โ€“ keeping me on the correct path, in his own cryptic ways. Glenn Hauman, my Scotty โ€“ always ensuring the ship is operating efficiently (except when he’s stranded somewhere without an internet connection…). And of course, Michael Davis, my Uhura โ€“ c’mon, I had to go there.

 

Suffice to say, I am many things to many people. Clearly, you now know though, who I really am. For the record? I am Marc Alan Fishman, and I am not like any fictional being. I am me, and dag nabbit, I’m happy to just be myself.

Mike Gold: The Big Booth 1105 Crossover

imagesIt was fated to happen. ComicMix is participating in our very first crossover.

This coming weekend โ€“ as in Friday, Saturday and Sunday โ€“ ComicMix will once again be appearing at the C2E2 comics and pop culture convention at Chicagoโ€™s McCormick Place, on the scenic downtown shore Lake Michigan near the Adler Planetarium, the Shedd Aquarium, the Field Natural History Museum, and that formerly beautiful football (and, next March, hockey) stadium Soldier (sic) Field โ€“ before that hideous flying saucer landed on top of it.

More prestigious still, we ComicMixers will be teaming up with our good buddies at Unshaven Comics. This means the โ€œgoodโ€ Marc Alan Fishman will be appearing at the same booth as the โ€œevilโ€ Marc Alan Fishman. And if they inadvertently touchโ€ฆ well, letโ€™s just say people will stop bitching about Mrs. Oโ€™Learyโ€™s improperly defamed cow.

Representing ComicMix: Glenn Hauman, Adriane Nash, either the good or the evil Marc Alan Fishman (I can never tell which one is which) and yours fairly truly. We will be making two โ€“ count โ€˜em two ยญโ€“ major announcements at the show, each of which will be promptly detailed in this slice of the etherverse. I wonโ€™t tip our collective hand, but I will say this: the second of these announcements will reveal what โ€œCMPSโ€ stands for. I mean this in the acronymical sense, and not in any ethical sense. Certainly not.

Weโ€™ll be at booth 1105 in case you didnโ€™t read the headline, and you should because the editor-in-chief spends a lot of time obsessing over them. We eagerly await the opportunity to meet you. Unless youโ€™re rude or insulting; then, we eagerly await the opportunity to let out our pent-up convention aggression. In my case, well, Iโ€™ve been going to comic book conventions for 45 years now. But I also used to be among the crowd that founded and ran the amazingly perfect Chicago Comicon, so I know this wonโ€™t be an issue.

Truth be told, I like Chicago conventions that are actually held within the city limits. Thereโ€™s a bunch of reasons for this: the fans are amazingly friendly, the food is unbelievable, the city is everything great that New York City says it is but isnโ€™t and can never be, and โ€“ most important โ€“ the Fire Marshal, for some odd reason, actually enforces the fire laws at massive conglomerations of humans and paper goods.

Holy Odinโ€™s Eyehole, Iโ€™m gotta get it from insecure New Yorkers, arenโ€™t I? Well, as you read this Iโ€™m already in Chicago (meetings, meetings, meetings; all at amazing restaurants) so I can only respond in person on the convention floor. Please re-read the sentence above about rude or insulting people and my 45 years of pent-up convention aggression.

Weโ€™re gonna have us a swell time. And to take tongue out of cheek for a rare moment, I hope you-all can share those swell times with us.

I hope to see you this weekend.

THURSDAY: Dennis Oโ€™Neil

FRIDAY: Martha Thomases

ย 

Mindy Newell: Sandy’s Back In Jersey, Without Springsteen

newell-art-121105-3621014Ms. Newell lives, works and writes from New Jersey. Sadly, as of this typing she’s only living in New Jersey, and she’s doing so without power. Ergo, no computer. Ergo, no column.

It looks like Mindy wins the race. Gold, Hauman, and Ostrander got their power back fairly early; Thomases got hers back Saturday morning. We haven’t heard from O’Neil or Whitten, but we’re assuming they’re electrically viable. Fishman didn’t lose power but he did get 20 foot waves off of Lake Michigan, which, actually, is amazing. Davis didn’t lose power but he doesn’t know that right now.

Hope you’re doing swell. And the creek don’t rise.